Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

anonimeeeee

Offline (9 hours ago) | Search for a member

anonimeeeee

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 July 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6283
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

anonimeeeee's page activity

Visits<b>cluch3</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:14pm<b>christian1509</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 4:38pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 10:30pm<b>beatrice18</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 8:38pm<b>Tim2415</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:39pm<b>stealth647</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 8:58am<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 3:11pm<b>cosicosei</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 12:50am<b>olpally</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:07am<b>That_Wolf_Gurl</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:30pm<b>jujuthefroggy</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 10:04am<b>FallenShadows</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 3:50pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:32pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 2:25pm<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 11:54pm<b>LmfaoLmao</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 1:54pm<b>AustinDillon3Fan</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 1:00pm<b>Carmelo_Anthony1</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 12:04pm

anonimeeeee's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of anonimeeeee's badges

anonimeeeee's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49361) - you deserved it (13974)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my 15-year-old daughter's pregnancy test came back positive. I wanted to know who the father is, so I could sit the two of them down to talk the situation through with them. She isn't sure if it's her best friend, or our neighbor's son. FML

#20777059
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65049) - you deserved it (11437)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:19am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML

#20776430
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48991) - you deserved it (17939)

On 07/11/2013 at 7:13pm - kids - by thanks, Nemo. - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, after I got turned down for yet another job, my dad glanced up at me and casually remarked that porn is always a stable market. FML

#20776199
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59518) - you deserved it (6304)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by fucked up dad (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59470) - you deserved it (6979)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

#20763013
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62469) - you deserved it (11729)

On 07/04/2013 at 3:03am - intimacy - by Never Going Back To The Doctor (woman) - United States

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML

#20762781
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67707) - you deserved it (5854)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by OnPlanetVenus (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

#20752893
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51932) - you deserved it (5957)

On 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm - work - by DocKreso (man) - Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska)

Today, my demented asswipe of a lab partner thought it'd be funny to replace the birthday gift I bought for my girlfriend with the large intestine of a recently-dissected dog. My girlfriend nearly fainted when she opened the gift box, and accused me of planning the whole thing. FML

#20752461
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44728) - you deserved it (3092)

On 06/28/2013 at 1:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, I held a party for my family so I could announce my pregnancy. In the middle of my speech, my mother stopped me, saying, "Nobody gives a rat's ass, where's the booze?" FML

#20745652
83 comments

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML

#20743211
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53877) - you deserved it (7886)

On 06/23/2013 at 7:36pm - kids - by joe - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML

#20740333
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79654) - you deserved it (18098)

On 06/22/2013 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

#20731946
447 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62844) - you deserved it (38976)

On 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm - kids - by young grandpa - United States (Georgia)

Today, I lost my virginity. Not only did my parents somehow find out, they posted about it on Facebook. FML

#20730822
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51724) - you deserved it (10801)

On 06/17/2013 at 1:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my pet rabbit to the vet because I had noticed his genitals looked swollen compared to my other rabbit's. It turns out he's just "gifted". The vet laughed at me. FML

#20719275
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45959) - you deserved it (6887)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:00am - animals - by Rjlup - United States (Colorado)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: