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anonimeeeee

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anonimeeeee

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 July 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6147
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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anonimeeeee's page activity

Visits<b>cluch3</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:14pm<b>christian1509</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 4:38pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 10:30pm<b>beatrice18</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 8:38pm<b>Tim2415</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:39pm<b>stealth647</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 8:58am<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 3:11pm<b>cosicosei</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 12:50am<b>olpally</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:07am<b>That_Wolf_Gurl</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:30pm<b>jujuthefroggy</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 10:04am<b>FallenShadows</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 3:50pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:32pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 2:25pm<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 11:54pm<b>LmfaoLmao</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 1:54pm<b>AustinDillon3Fan</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 1:00pm<b>Carmelo_Anthony1</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 12:04pm

anonimeeeee's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of anonimeeeee's badges

anonimeeeee's favorite FMLs

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27804) - you deserved it (2384)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11484) - you deserved it (38313)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I was called into my first day of work as a cashier. Not even 30 minutes into training, my boss had already "accidentally" touched my ass 7 times. FML

#19897423
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28968) - you deserved it (2461)

On 07/05/2012 at 10:13pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39114) - you deserved it (9454)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML

#19881083
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27056) - you deserved it (1817)

On 07/02/2012 at 1:44pm - health - by justhelpful (woman) - Austria (Tirol)

Today, I went to the beach with my boyfriend and family. My sister coyly pointed out the scratch marks down his back, hoping to embarrass me in front of my parents. The marks weren't from me. FML

#19873995
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30898) - you deserved it (2150)

On 07/01/2012 at 12:22am - love - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise. I stood up, took a moment to soak up some sunlight, and then spent the next hour too scared to go make my morning coffee, after my mother loudly moaned, "Ah yeah, give it to me, Woody!" from down the hall. FML

#19721854
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28347) - you deserved it (2245)

On 06/02/2012 at 4:31pm - intimacy - by huh (woman) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

#19668387
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22939) - you deserved it (4707)

On 05/23/2012 at 4:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, the "My body is beautiful" t-shirt that my therapist gave me didn't fit. FML

#19644277
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28145) - you deserved it (6273)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:46pm - health - by msassy - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

#19627538
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23773) - you deserved it (7840)

On 05/15/2012 at 3:02pm - misc - by FML (woman) - Finland

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39525) - you deserved it (4086) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML

#19579357
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11180) - you deserved it (34058)

On 05/05/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by mhm (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

#19578544
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17515) - you deserved it (29993)

On 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm - animals - by doggone - United States (Pennsylvania)



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