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annalise14

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annalise14
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  • Number of visits : 89
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About annalise14 : 4•27•13

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annalise14's favorite FMLs

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, while in the restroom washing my hands, a girl decided to let one rip while in the stall. When she came out she gave me a dirty look of disgust and said, "At least wait until I leave." She and I were the only ones in the restroom. FML

#20841231
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42611) - you deserved it (2811)

On 08/17/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by mugres22 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML

#20807336
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42365) - you deserved it (3240)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:28am - animals - by mishyb (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53060) - you deserved it (18206)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

#20709788
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49154) - you deserved it (3346)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

Today, I learned that my big, tough, strong dog is terrified of spiders when he jumped, knocked over a table and then peed on the spider to drown it. FML

#20495511
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27055) - you deserved it (4039)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:59am - animals - by DogLover (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at my four-year-old daughter's insistence, I looked for - and found - a radio station that plays "Santa music" all year round. She's ecstatic and I can't turn it off without upsetting her. FML

#20436981
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22473) - you deserved it (9783)

On 01/01/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by christmaswillneverend - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, someone very close to me came out of the closet. Normally I would fully support them, had we not just gotten married. FML

#20181869
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35534) - you deserved it (2181)

On 11/27/2012 at 10:08pm - love - by Bliggins - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

#19772012
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19457) - you deserved it (2454)

On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML

#19712062
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18067) - you deserved it (6272)

On 05/31/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by jemila (woman) - United States

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

#19363371
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7485) - you deserved it (21371)

On 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

#18358033
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61043) - you deserved it (2880)

On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29472) - you deserved it (2849)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

#16607799
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32275) - you deserved it (6615)

On 06/11/2011 at 7:12am - kids - by julia - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML

#13696157
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25739) - you deserved it (8295)

On 11/03/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by nk (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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