Search for a member

Offline (the 12/11/2014 at 8:51am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 617
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

annalise14's page activity

Visits<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 10:24pm<b>suoerkewl</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 2:06pm<b>Jelbeztok</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 4:50pm<b>454ss</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 12:13pm<b>pimentel25</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 1:33pm<b>crackmore278</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 1:30pm<b>plainoldLyss</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 6:18pm<b>JonnyBoy18</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 10:46am<b>liamoneil93</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 7:32pm<b>treynation</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 5:31pm<b>HVAkicker99</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 12:23am<b>raininginseattle</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 11:04am<b>strangenesslover</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 3:29am<b>sassyland</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 2:30pm<b>Skittles_Wiki</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 11:32am<b>chamay</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 2:38pm<b>taylor27gang</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 9:40am<b>Aero_x</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 1:07pm

annalise14's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.


You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of annalise14's badges

annalise14's favorite FMLs

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

by Madster15 / 09/15/2013 at 2:05am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while in the restroom washing my hands, a girl decided to let one rip while in the stall. When she came out she gave me a dirty look of disgust and said, "At least wait until I leave." She and I were the only ones in the restroom. FML

by mugres22 / 08/17/2013 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML

by mishyb / 07/28/2013 at 12:28am / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

by needsnewshorts / 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

by Anonymous / 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm / Isle of Man / Kids

Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2013 at 12:16am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I learned that my big, tough, strong dog is terrified of spiders when he jumped, knocked over a table and then peed on the spider to drown it. FML

by DogLover / 02/06/2013 at 8:59am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, at my four-year-old daughter's insistence, I looked for - and found - a radio station that plays "Santa music" all year round. She's ecstatic and I can't turn it off without upsetting her. FML

by christmaswillneverend / 01/01/2013 at 7:18pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, someone very close to me came out of the closet. Normally I would fully support them, had we not just gotten married. FML

by Bliggins / 11/27/2012 at 10:08pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Love

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

by amidreaming?? / 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love

Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML

by jemila / 05/31/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

by yamsterr / 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United States / Love