anchorsaweigh003

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Offline (the 11/05/2014 at 10:19pm)

anchorsaweigh003

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 858
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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anchorsaweigh003's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 8:36am<b>unsealingkale</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 8:05pm<b>juliapereth</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:43am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 5:48pm<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 8:19am<b>depressed_child</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:02am<b>jalenlounis</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 4:45pm<b>beegreen01</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 2:12pm<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:00am<b>loveofer</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 5:53pm<b>agent4442</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 10:30pm<b>jadelolly</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 1:51pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 7:18pm<b>jeemaine</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 3:37pm<b>IloveToLaugh143</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:10am<b>sweetest_jenn</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 1:53am<b>Raveen</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Maxgolub</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 1:32pm

anchorsaweigh003's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of anchorsaweigh003's badges

anchorsaweigh003's favorite FMLs

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

by MILF / 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

by the long distance guy / 04/08/2014 at 3:56am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting my 4-year-old cousin. She scraped her knee, and in an attempt to cheer her up, I put a refrigerator box over my head and waddled around like a penguin. She stopped crying, but only after I fell down a flight of tile stairs. FML

by hbbbs / 03/01/2014 at 7:58pm / United States (California) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so excited at being about to beat my high score that I got a hard-on. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2014 at 5:26pm / Russian Federation (Moskva) / Intimacy

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm / United States / Love

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:20am / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, I downloaded a movie for my mom that she really likes, "When Harry Met Sally". When she loaded the file, we soon found out it was actually some kind of obscure porno billed as "When Harry Wet Sally". FML

by Anonymous / 01/05/2014 at 6:48pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2013 at 2:24am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

by hi Mum / 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, while on my way to work, an elderly woman complimented me on my breast cancer scarf. I explained that my grandmother made one for all her female grandchildren before passing away two years ago. The woman then went psycho and almost strangled me in an attempt to steal it. FML

by Whackgourd / 12/11/2013 at 1:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I saw the guy who helped me yesterday when I was lost by telling me which bus to take. He came up to me and asked me how it went. I told him that the bus went the exact opposite way I wanted to go. He laughed and said, "I know." FML

by Lemurcat / 12/11/2013 at 11:56am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boss gave me a verbal warning. My crime? Calling people "hon", "darlin'", and the like. I work at a Texas diner. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2013 at 5:36pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, during an otherwise promising job interview, I was asked how much I thought was too much for a "good hit of blow". I must have stayed speechless for too long, because the guy's next words were, "Yeah, you're not cut out for this." I'm shocked and baffled too. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2013 at 6:49am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I placed a Bible app next to an app I use for porn, in the hope that it will encourage me to watch less porn. I'm a girl. FML

by lilly1105 / 07/15/2013 at 9:19am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got mauled by some wild animals and had to get my butt cheek stitched up. The embarrassment doesn't end there though; the animals in question were kittens. The nurses on duty laughed and the entire ward found out. FML

by richardmrcs / 07/08/2013 at 4:00pm / United Kingdom (Bradford) / Animals