ambition83

Search for a member

Offline (the 07/15/2016 at 9:23pm)

ambition83

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 7 April 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 726
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ambition83 : Love this site... Sometimes life gives you lemons, but the lemons usually make a hilarious story

ambition83's page activity

Visits<b>chewsef</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 2:45am<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 2:00am<b>duduv2</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 7:29pm<b>Emanpirate68</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 1:32pm<b>dno79</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 9:16am<b>laynethefirst</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 9:14am<b>abdiG</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 3:18pm<b>tiitsmcgee</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 3:20pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 1:44am<b>idkwyatt</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:10am<b>pred8885</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 11:11pm<b>rwal0912</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 12:54pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 6:50am<b>katastrophicd</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 7:55pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 6:05pm<b>utrax</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 12:40am<b>jonah777</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 7:06pm<b>mhoch22</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:04am

Fucked!<b>chewsef</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 8:45am<b>dno79</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 3:16pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 9:18pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 7:44am<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 6:28am<b>katastrophicd</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 1:55am<b>jonah777</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 9:17pm

ambition83's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of ambition83's badges

ambition83's favorite FMLs

Today, school was out because of snow. My dad walked in my room and shouted "Why are you home?!" I told him why, and he replied, "Then get out the damn house and play in the snow." He tossed me out in nothing but my shorts. FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2014 at 4:49pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the generous gift from my boyfriend of a new iPhone was only given so he could use the "find my phone" function to make sure I'm always where I say I am each day. I'm being stalked by my own boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2014 at 1:25pm / Italy (Toscana) / Love

Today, it's my fifth wedding anniversary. My wife bailed on the romantic dinner that I arranged in favor of running off with her friends. Their big event: an amateur Fight Club event they'd decided to stage in an abandoned parking lot. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2013 at 12:41pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 2:56pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, after having sex for the first time with my girlfriend, I realised I was in love with her. I noticed she had an eyelash on her breast. After tugging it a few times I realised it was actually a single black nipple hair. She was so embarrassed, she kicked me out and now won't return my calls. FML

by ohman / 12/27/2012 at 10:06pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy

Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 7:06pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up feeling ecstatic, because last night, my crush had told my best friend he likes me a lot. I sent him a text message telling him the feeling is mutual. A little while after sending it, it hit me that his confession had only been part of a dream. FML

by hannah / 09/15/2012 at 6:16pm / New Zealand (Marlborough) / Love

Today, instead of staying home, I took an hour-long bus ride in the middle of the night to my girlfriend's place because on the phone she said, "I desperately need your body right now". It turned out she was just cold. She is also on her period. FML

by Rotarius / 08/23/2012 at 2:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I went to visit my husband's grave. I was unable to mourn in peace because some teenagers were smoking pot and talking about a government conspiracy "to change the way gravity works" on the next grave over. FML

by notnicefools / 05/28/2012 at 10:51pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

by Hakimstah / 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm / Lebanon / Intimacy

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

by me / 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed fuck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML

by soontobedumped / 01/15/2012 at 2:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML

by Kyle / 05/10/2011 at 6:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from my grandmother. Turns out my father found out about my elopement with my husband through my stepmother, because someone she works with told her. We were planning on it being a surprise, and telling people on Christmas. My father won't even talk to me now. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2010 at 3:08am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, while working as a carhop at Sonic, my roller skates ran over some gravel and I fell, causing me to drop a tray of food. I found out later that one of the customers had deliberately done that to see if I would trip. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2010 at 1:44pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work