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ambition83

Offline (yesterday at 5:25pm) | Search for a member

ambition83

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 362
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ambition83 : Love this site... Sometimes life gives you lemons, but the lemons usually make a hilarious story

ambition83's page activity

Visits<b>WallyQ</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 1:25pm<b>1two3four5six</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 5:34am<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:15pm<b>SwimmingBassist</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 1:27am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 9:52am<b>jassi747</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:52pm<b>eMurpH</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 1:09am<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 10:05pm

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ambition83's favorite FMLs

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

#21061154
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53005) - you deserved it (5259)

On 02/15/2014 at 2:11am - work - by chinaski7628 - United States (California)

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

#21059471
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46552) - you deserved it (6575)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

#21055217
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39031) - you deserved it (7500)

On 02/09/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by took it - United States (New York)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

#21054451
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51093) - you deserved it (10035)

On 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon after I had explained to her how scared I was of the exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

#21054343
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43033) - you deserved it (5835)

On 02/08/2014 at 12:13pm - misc - by so scared - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

#21046118
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59167) - you deserved it (11469)

On 01/31/2014 at 10:29am - intimacy - by wtfjusthappened - United States (Washington)

Today, me and my boyfriend were having sex. As we were getting into it, his cat came into the room, sat, and stared us down with what looked like disapproving eyes. After 5 minutes had gone by, we stopped completely. A cat just cock blocked me. FML

#21045897
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47688) - you deserved it (7051)

On 01/31/2014 at 1:16am - intimacy - by CatBlock (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while playing badminton at school, I got an opponent who is mentally handicapped. Since I'm terrible at the game, I guess the teacher assumed it would be a good match. I won the match, my first victory ever. My teacher accused me of cheating to humiliate him. FML

#21045157
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41104) - you deserved it (4019)

On 01/30/2014 at 1:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49971) - you deserved it (6257)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, school was out because of snow. My dad walked in my room and shouted "Why are you home?!" I told him why, and he replied, "Then get out the damn house and play in the snow." He tossed me out in nothing but my shorts. FML

#21037332
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37450) - you deserved it (4701)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I found out that the generous gift from my boyfriend of a new iPhone was only given so he could use the "find my phone" function to make sure I'm always where I say I am each day. I'm being stalked by my own boyfriend. FML

#21028727
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51315) - you deserved it (8458)

On 01/15/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, it's my fifth wedding anniversary. My wife bailed on the romantic dinner that I arranged in favor of running off with her friends. Their big event: an amateur Fight Club event they'd decided to stage in an abandoned parking lot. FML

#20792281
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41368) - you deserved it (3831)

On 07/19/2013 at 12:41pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

#20618445
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77653) - you deserved it (9356)

On 04/24/2013 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, after having sex for the first time with my girlfriend, I realised I was in love with her. I noticed she had an eyelash on her breast. After tugging it a few times I realised it was actually a single black nipple hair. She was so embarrassed, she kicked me out and now won't return my calls. FML

#20426821
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32734) - you deserved it (25261)

On 12/27/2012 at 10:06pm - intimacy - by ohman (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML

#20401145
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26119) - you deserved it (3960)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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