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amanda1472's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
amanda1472's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 3:08am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, one of the girls who has made it her job to ruin my life cornered me in the hallway at school. She tried to insult me, and for the first time in my life I had a scathing comeback. My elation quickly ended when she violently shoved my face into the water fountain. FML
by ShadowReiku / 12/13/2012 at 3:39am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother told my therapist that I've been reverting to childlike behavior and she was worried about my maturity. She was worried because I screamed hysterically after dropping a pot of boiling noodles on my lap. FML
by Anonymous / 12/13/2012 at 3:31am / United States / Health
Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML
by woodless / 12/09/2012 at 10:29am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the devil tempted her. FML
by sonofahypocriticalwhore / 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by bieberslayer / 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm / United States / Geek
Today, my girlfriend showed me a print of a Banksy that she'd just bought, telling me it was an original. When I tried to argue that it wasn't, she broke up with me for "implying she was a moron." FML
by Single / 12/04/2012 at 11:17am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Love
Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML
by Anonymous / 12/02/2012 at 3:19am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML
by Anna / 12/02/2012 at 3:03am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my parents. They told me to come home immediately. Panicking, I rushed home. My dad pulled out a clear tube filled with dried leaves. They accused me of having marijuana. It was catnip for my kitten. FML
by potheadloljk / 12/01/2012 at 9:01pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML
by time to put you down, gran / 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML
by Anonymous / 12/01/2012 at 1:06am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/01/2012 at 12:59am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by Rachael / 11/30/2012 at 2:29am / Australia / Miscellaneous
by Awks / 11/30/2012 at 1:30am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous