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alliewillie

Offline (the 02/10/2016 at 10:15pm) | Search for a member

alliewillie

12Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 27267
  • Number of comments : 256
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

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alliewillie's page activity

Visits<b>callcopse</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 11:56am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 11:29am<b>supr_sexy</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 2:07pm<b>sabres5730</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 12:57pm<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 9:25pm<b>JimonSern</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 10:42am<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 2:13pm<b>KaySL</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 5:32am<b>samrompain</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 6:43pm<b>ruprisura</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 10:29pm<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 2:17pm<b>muis545</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:56pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 6:32pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 6:04am<b>tigersman1c</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 10:53pm<b>Westifer</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 8:30pm<b>jill97</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 1:22am<b>Mean_Oreo2436</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 12:18am

Fucked!<b>callcopse</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 5:56pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:23pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:19am<b>paravoz</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:18am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 5:57am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 10:12am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 5:18am<b>TashyXD101</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 11:56pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:40pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:59am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:47am

alliewillie's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of alliewillie's badges

alliewillie's favorite FMLs

Today, I invited everyone to a gig I'm playing at a bar. They closed it down just for me when I told them how many people were attending, and I spent all day setting it up. Turns out nobody showed up besides my mom, my dad, and 2 of my cousins. I still had to play 7 songs in front of them. FML

#4546975
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46843) - you deserved it (6647)

On 08/15/2009 at 11:02am - misc - by playinmyguitar (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while having sex I realized two things. First, I can't remember the last time my boyfriend gave me an orgasm, and secondly I think the curtains slightly clash with the duvet cover. I was more annoyed with the second one. FML

#4527001
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48220) - you deserved it (10261)

On 08/14/2009 at 2:33pm - intimacy - by vicgal - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64597) - you deserved it (7651)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I read an incoming message on my wife's phone. "I miss your warm hands and mouth". The message came from a female co-worker of hers. FML

#4506160
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52691) - you deserved it (5879)

On 08/13/2009 at 5:49pm - love - by rick (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

#4499384
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72665) - you deserved it (8101)

On 08/13/2009 at 11:23am - intimacy - by esb (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML

#4488799
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (106059) - you deserved it (5373)

On 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm - intimacy - by JPF (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that doctors can be wrong. Pink clothes, pink stroller, pink bottles, pink bibs, pink cribs and pink bedding to go with my baby that recently came out with a little pink penis. FML

#4483118
396 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57817) - you deserved it (21681)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:36pm - kids - by Ouch (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML

#4472401
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54874) - you deserved it (7454)

On 08/12/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by maidmyday (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML

#4472401
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54874) - you deserved it (7454)

On 08/12/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by maidmyday (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my ex got dumped by his girlfriend. Seeing my opportunity I sent him a song I wrote for him about how much I still love him. He sent it on to the girl who had just dumped him claiming he had written it. They are back together. FML

#4470917
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59280) - you deserved it (21987)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:18am - love - by sadsongstress (woman) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, I came home early from business trip in Paris, I bought an engagement ring. I was going to take my girlfriend of 2 years out and propose to her. I sneak into my house as a surprise and she's having it off with another man. Now I have a ring that I can only return in France. FML

#4431065
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61043) - you deserved it (3975)

On 08/10/2009 at 4:47pm - love - by theboy6494 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We start going at it and we were both butt naked when I see a car pull into the lot. Not only is it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asks my girlfriend is "Are you being held against your will?" FML

#4429167
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44852) - you deserved it (13560)

On 08/10/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by kmf - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML

#4428551
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10398) - you deserved it (72755)

On 08/10/2009 at 2:28pm - misc - by hitandrun (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I bought a new computer. I gave my old one to my mother. After handing it over and going home, I realised I forgot to change the background picture, a naked photo of my girlfriend. FML

#4426639
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9397) - you deserved it (65873)

On 08/10/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by picaboo (man) - Singapore

Today, I was having a serious discussion with my girlfriend of 11 months. I broke the news that I was diagnosed with Lymphoma and I needed her support through my treatments. Ten minutes after, I receive a text saying that she can't endure the pain and stress that I'm causing her, and that we're done. FML



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