alliewillie

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Offline (the 06/21/2016 at 6:29am)

alliewillie

13Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 29567
  • Number of comments : 256
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

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alliewillie's page activity

Visits<b>guskta</b> - the 06/02/2016 at 11:05am<b>archimedes200</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 4:55pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 10:54pm<b>random2212</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 11:24pm<b>JohnTheDonJuan</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 2:25am<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 4:29pm<b>PissedTumor</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 5:38pm<b>Iamentertained</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 12:18pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 7:50am<b>scout678</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 4:42pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 7:26pm<b>heroqucas</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 5:28am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 12:41pm<b>AfroCircusMan</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 5:28am<b>callcopse</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 11:56am<b>supr_sexy</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 2:07pm<b>sabres5730</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 12:57pm<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 9:25pm

Fucked!<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 10:29pm<b>callcopse</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 5:56pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:23pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:19am<b>paravoz</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:18am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 5:57am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 10:12am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 5:18am<b>TashyXD101</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 11:56pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:40pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:59am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:47am

alliewillie's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of alliewillie's badges

alliewillie's favorite FMLs

Today, this guy who likes me accused me of cutting myself. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, "Don't lie, I saw those scars on your thighs when we went swimming." I have stretch marks on my inner thighs, and now I have to explain them to him so he doesn't think I cut myself. FML

by tessykins / 10/22/2009 at 3:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, this guy who likes me accused me of cutting myself. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, "Don't lie, I saw those scars on your thighs when we went swimming." I have stretch marks on my inner thighs, and now I have to explain them to him so he doesn't think I cut myself. FML

by tessykins / 10/22/2009 at 3:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé and I met his mother for lunch to discuss wedding plans. When we got there, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands. I heard a woman talking on her cell phone in the stall about her son's "disgusting, slutty girlfriend." The toilet flushed and my future mother-in-law walked out. FML

by uneek_3225 / 10/22/2009 at 1:53am / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, for my two month anniversary, my boyfriend surprised me with a "present". He then lifted his pant leg. He had carved my initials into his leg with a knife. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2009 at 11:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML

by Busted / 10/21/2009 at 5:25pm / United States (Vermont) / Intimacy

Today, I was exercising, laid on my back, lifting weights over my head. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to casually sit by my feet and suddenly tickle them mercilessly. Caught off guard, I started wiggling, laughed and dropped the weights. On my face. FML

by 20lbknockout / 10/20/2009 at 12:26am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, I discovered that nothing kills a wet dream faster than a kitten who pounces on things that wiggle under the blanket. FML

by JohnB / 10/19/2009 at 8:43pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was texting my boyfriend, making plans to see him tomorrow. He ended the conversation by saying "I'm changing my sheets tomorrow, so take a shower." FML

by Shower? / 10/19/2009 at 3:26am / Intimacy

Today, I handed out 30 resumes only to find out, after the last resume was handed out, my brother had changed the last sentence of every paragraph to 'I am a massive douche bag.' FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2009 at 6:52am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML

by userrrrr / 10/17/2009 at 10:25pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, a person came into McDonald's, where I work. They ordered a happy meal. As they were an adult, I assumed the meal was for their child, who wasn't with them. When I asked if the toy was for a boy or a girl, they said the toy was for them. I still had to ask if it was for a boy or a girl. FML

by paris78 / 10/17/2009 at 8:04pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML

by hamster cookie / 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm / Kids

Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML

by Ohgreat / 10/17/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I took a box of Halloween decorations down from the attic. Inside, were a bunch of fake spiders. I emptied the box onto the floor and the "fake" spiders crawled all over the living room in opposite directions. FML

by Halloweenie / 10/16/2009 at 4:44am / United States (Hawaii) / Animals

Today, I took a box of Halloween decorations down from the attic. Inside, were a bunch of fake spiders. I emptied the box onto the floor and the "fake" spiders crawled all over the living room in opposite directions. FML

by Halloweenie / 10/16/2009 at 4:44am / United States (Hawaii) / Animals