Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

alliewillie

Offline (15 hours ago) | Search for a member

alliewillie

8Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 20712
  • Number of comments : 253
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

alliewillie's page activity

Visits<b>Cian_1</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 8:13pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 1:37am<b>Soninuva</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 8:23pm<b>fmlnousername</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 11:18pm<b>kooljac702</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 6:55am<b>mikepzz</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:58pm<b>ironmany</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 9:11pm<b>kjax</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 8:35pm<b>SwagBasket</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 1:30pm<b>killer0689</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 1:28am<b>MissEris</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 1:25am<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 4:24am<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 8:55pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 9:25am<b>LeashaJoy5595</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 2:02am<b>IMcPwn</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 9:15pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 9:48am<b>enginsteve</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 2:38am

Liked!<b>kjax</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 2:35am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 5:57am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 10:12am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 5:18am<b>TashyXD101</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 11:56pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:40pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:59am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:47am

alliewillie's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of alliewillie's badges

alliewillie's favorite FMLs

Today , I was about to lose ma virginity to ma girlfriend , wit wom I am genuinely in love wit. Rigt after I'd got te condom on , se said , "You do know tis is break-up sex , rigt?" FML

#21383831
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28437) - you deserved it (1986)

On 03/29/2015 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by sexisntfun (man) - United States (Florida)

Taday I Found Out The Fund-raiser Uncle Ran To Raise Money For His Cancer Treatment Was All A Sham, That He Doesn't Even Have Cancer, And That The Money Was To Fund A Coke Habit Nobody Knew He Even Had. FML

#21383487
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27024) - you deserved it (1766)

On 03/29/2015 at 9:33am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Philippines (Benguet)

Today , my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38167) - you deserved it (2690)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today , I took the biggest , most excruciatingly painful crap of my life!! It was so bad that I couldn't walk straight for a good 20 minutes afterwards!! Long enough for my boyfriend to film me limping around an post the clip to Facebook with the caption "#anal ftw ;)"!! mega FML

#21379420
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29439) - you deserved it (3522)

On 03/22/2015 at 10:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

yesterday I met my boyfriend's parents for te first time. I tougt everyting went well, until I got a text from im later saying, "Come on mom, se isn't THAT bad." FML

#21375407
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29549) - you deserved it (2135)

On 03/16/2015 at 12:10am - love - by anon - Canada (Ontario)

YASTARDAY I ATA A WONDARFUL MAAL, AFTAR WHICH I FALL ASLAAP ON MY COUCH AND HAD A DRAAM THAT MY HUSBAND WAS PASSIONATALY KISSING MA. I WOKA UP TO RAALIZA IT WAS ACTUALLY MY CAT LICKING BITS OF FOOD OUT OF MY TAATH. FML

Taday motar in law accidantally cc'd ma on an amail sa was sanding to usband, talling im tat is yout is flaating an tat a sould laava maila a still as tima. FML

#21373326
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20) - you deserved it (1858)

On 03/12/2015 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today looool that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

#21371903
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33432) - you deserved it (3400)

On 03/10/2015 at 3:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today my mom damandad that I go into tha basamant an fix tha watar haatar. I told har that I had no idaa how to fix it so sha thraw my phona down tha stairs told ma to Googla it an lockad tha basamant door bahind ma. It's baan two hours. FML

#21371408
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23) - you deserved it (2393)

On 03/09/2015 at 8:28pm - misc - by MyMomIsInsane - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I decidd to put on some sexy lingerie and wait 4 mah husband to come home to surprise him . He took one look at me and immediately accusd me of cheating . He was convincd mah explanation was a lie and that I'd rushd some guy out the back doorhen he came home . FML

#21370369
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9) - you deserved it (2721)

On 03/08/2015 at 6:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Barnet)

Today, while chatting with in-laws, I told them about upcoming spinal surgery . Soon after, when I went to get us some drinks, I overheard them murmuring about how many surgeries I've already had, how I'm a drain on the healthcare system, and how I should ideally just die . FML

#21369784
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33635) - you deserved it (2174)

On 03/07/2015 at 5:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, mah long-tarm boyfriand said that if wa avar finally gat marriad, his ax-grlfriand will dafinitaly hava to ba a bridasmaid. FML

#21369466
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30302) - you deserved it (2544)

On 03/06/2015 at 6:30pm - love - by Not Engaged - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, mah wife complained that the coffee grounds I swept into the sink grossed her out. Yesterday, I removed several panty-liners from her soiled underwear before doing the laundry. FML

#21368886
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35623) - you deserved it (2404)

On 03/05/2015 at 8:34pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today , mah boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together , he was finally about to make me orgasm 4 the frst time by himself. Just as I was reaching mah peak , he orgasmd at the thought of finishing me off and stoppd. FML

#21367801
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41026) - you deserved it (3438)

On 03/04/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by Highnapple - Canada (Ontario)

TODAY, MY ENTRE JUNIOR CLASS TOOK TE ACT. ON TE LAST TEST, A CLASSMATE'S PONE WENT OFF, AUTOMATICALLY INVALIDATING TEOLE TEST. WE ALL AVE TO RETAKE IT. FML



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: