alldavedup

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Offline (the 04/13/2016 at 5:38pm)

alldavedup

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 30 July 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 708
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About alldavedup : to speak is to have purpose, i have no purpose but that of which to speak.

alldavedup's page activity

Visits<b>trucker2</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 1:51am<b>Chadica</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 9:42am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 4:16pm<b>keepcalmandbacon</b> - the 03/22/2013 at 7:16pm<b>rcbarnes</b> - the 12/06/2011 at 1:06am<b>CAPTmok</b> - the 06/12/2011 at 6:43am<b>babygirl1023</b> - the 05/27/2011 at 6:35pm<b>smulen</b> - the 05/23/2011 at 3:30am<b>FaceMyLies</b> - the 01/29/2011 at 8:55am<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 10:04pm

alldavedup's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of alldavedup's badges

alldavedup's favorite FMLs

Today, as a romantic gesture, my boyfriend gifted me an origami vagina. FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2012 at 10:59am / Ireland (Cork) / Intimacy

Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML

by lisahb / 06/19/2012 at 6:16pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

by megasniper240 / 06/19/2012 at 11:35am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 7:52pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2012 at 11:24am / United States / Love

Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML

by fuck / 04/20/2012 at 10:48pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, while talking to my girlfriend, the subject of Darth Vader came up. That's when she asked me, "Aren't Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker the same person?" I don't know what's worse, the fact that she asked me that, or the fact that I got upset over her lack of Star Wars knowledge. FML

by Nadaz / 04/05/2012 at 7:29am / United States (North Carolina) / Geek

Today, I was woken up by my neighbour's dog losing its mind, and I remembered reading a story about someone ignoring a dog and later finding out that their car had been stolen. Paranoid, I went outside to check on mine. Nope. Just the damn dog barking at one thirty in the morning. FML

by DamnDogs / 03/05/2012 at 5:28am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend's Marine dad walked in on us fooling around naked. Now we can only hang out with "parental supervision". Oh, and I have to record my visits on a clipboard by the door. FML

by Duplighost / 01/12/2012 at 3:16pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the bar with a date. My date made a joke about me being a slow drinker, so I tried to impress her by chugging the rest of my glass. She was impressed with how fast I chugged my beer, until it came back up. FML

by ol faithful / 09/03/2011 at 5:24am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a long discussion, my dad still doesn't understand how evolution works, and thinks it's a myth that was debunked a long time ago. FML

by Ryan / 08/28/2011 at 4:10pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned how to wolf-whistle properly, and then learned what it feels like to be slapped on the head. FML

by youknowwhatitis / 06/22/2011 at 9:31am / Australia (South Australia) / Health

Today, our new cat, which my mum was hesitant about letting us keep because she believes they're diseased, gave us all ringworm. FML

by catlover / 06/16/2011 at 12:14pm / China / Animals

Today, on my Facebook, the stripper my ex husband cheated on me with showed up in the "People You May Know" box. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2011 at 9:48am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I've been on the same train for two hours at a standstill due to "signal problems". We can't get off because it's "unsafe". I'm on my way home from work and I can see my house through the window. FML

by bananaman / 04/11/2011 at 4:07pm / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation