alival

Search for a member

alival

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 October 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3340
  • Number of comments : 215
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About alival : Hey! I'm alison but you can call me Ali! I looove motionless in white, falling in reverse, blessthefall, and all time low! I am a proud child of the night/creature whichever floats your boat! I love talking to new people so if you wanna know more about me send me a message!

alival's page activity

Visits<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 12:37am<b>SiraSiemens</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 12:25pm<b>zeginger</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:18pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 3:08am<b>Burton_Forever</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 4:01am<b>austinsixx1994</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 11:07pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 10:06am<b>heybro19</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 8:49pm<b>ShroudedKnife</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 2:01am<b>americanafrican</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 6:17pm<b>RichieRichhh</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:42pm<b>Malfano0214</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 2:12pm<b>kianabanannna</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 11:04am<b>cecesavannah2015</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 1:42am<b>michaelbusmc</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 10:46pm<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 9:44am<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 9:53am<b>dannnngthatsux</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 6:58pm

Fucked!<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 6:38am<b>SiraSiemens</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 6:26pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 11:18am

alival's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of alival's badges

alival's favorite FMLs

Today, my family started their own version of the Hunger Games. With farts as their ammo, they've been tackling and gassing everyone until their victim "dies" by surrendering. My house is a flatulent war zone, and I fear waking up blind. FML

by district12 / 02/18/2012 at 5:22pm / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Health

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a fancy dinner to celebrate our anniversary. When the waitress came, we instantly recognized each other. She was the girl I'd had a one night stand with a few weeks before. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada / Love

Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML

by Username / 02/13/2012 at 4:31pm / India / Kids

Today, I came home to a furious wife and an answering machine message from a woman neither of us know claiming I got her pregnant. My wife won't believe she got the wrong number. FML

by Innocent / 01/28/2012 at 8:40am / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of two years accidentally admitted to me that he settled for me because he doesn't think he can do any better. FML

by Anonymous / 01/28/2012 at 4:30am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had a testicular ultrasound. The ultrasound tech was a very attractive woman. This is the first time in the past four and a half years a woman has touched my package, and I had to get health issues to make it happen. FML

by BigDT / 01/28/2012 at 3:35am / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML

by wish.was.single / 01/25/2012 at 1:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I am 8 weeks pregnant. I have debilitating 'morning sickness' all day. And now I get to add peeing my pants every time I throw up. FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2012 at 9:07am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

by Danny / 01/07/2012 at 5:27am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, while I was in the break room at work, one of my coworkers walked in on me playing with my animal crackers, complete with animal noises. Now, the entire department won't stop teasing me and calling me Tarzan. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 3:55pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, while watching Rio, I got a boner when Blu and Jewel kissed. This is almost as pathetic as getting a boner a few days ago while watching Homer and Marge kiss on The Simpsons. I think I'm way past the point of ever getting laid. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2012 at 1:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

by Grandson / 01/01/2012 at 8:51am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my mom I was going to a New Year's party. She told me to be back by midnight. FML

by tooearly / 01/01/2012 at 3:31am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my mom I was going to a New Year's party. She told me to be back by midnight. FML

by tooearly / 01/01/2012 at 3:31am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I stayed up until 4 am. I was waiting for both my cats to fall asleep, so I could play Santa and stuff their stockings in secret. FML

by Anonymoose / 12/25/2011 at 6:39am / Switzerland (Zurich) / Animals