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alissa412

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alissa412

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alissa412
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3238
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About alissa412 : I can usually be found making sarcastic comments, and attempting to collect badges (not sure why, something addicting about figuring out what they are)

alissa412's page activity

Visits<b>nicolai44</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 5:18pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 7:11pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 10:39pm<b>watchwhileusleep</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 5:21pm<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 8:46pm<b>oldjohnny</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 10:30am<b>monzu</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 12:52pm<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 10:13am<b>itcouldbeanyone</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 12:19am<b>chriss2015</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:40pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 4:56pm<b>Mkm1997</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:04pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:30am<b>kidtoy</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:21am<b>darwinism</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:02am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 6:52am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 6:31am<b>lat187</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 6:22am

Fucked!<b>Tripartita</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 4:40am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 4:14pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:57pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:52pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 6:04am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 9:31am<b>aizai97</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 9:16am

alissa412's FML badges

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of alissa412's badges

alissa412's favorite FMLs

Today, at the age of 20, I still have a bed time. It is strictly enforced by my cat via endless meows if I am up past 11 pm. FML

#21510035
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21250) - you deserved it (4064)

On 01/01/2016 at 2:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I finally realized the toll working as a cashier 5 days a week during the holidays does to your psyche. I just said "Welcome To Walgreens", out of pure reflex, to my cat as she walked into my kitchen. FML

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

#21493785
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (8727)

On 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

#21470966
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29276) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dog brought me a a dead rabbit. It so happened to be the rabbit a group of neighborhood kids were looking for after they lost it yesterday. I just had to hide a body for my dog. FML

Today, I stayed over at my boyfriend's house for the first time. He soon found out about my sleep-talking habit. I started ranting about "electron shaming" and I apparently passionately support their "sub-atomic lifestyle". Yes, he managed to get it on video. FML

#21439547
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26736) - you deserved it (3081)

On 07/10/2015 at 12:57pm - misc - by wantmeasandwich (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I'm actually starting to miss my former heroin addict neighbor because of how mellow he was compared to my new neighbors. FML

#21427797
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27999) - you deserved it (2368)

On 06/17/2015 at 10:07pm - money - by Rusty (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took new sleeping meds. One of the side effects was sleepwalking. I had a dream my girlfriend wanted me to pee on her. Apparently, while sleepwalking, I pissed all over our dog. FML

#21423425
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24649) - you deserved it (2988)

On 06/09/2015 at 4:03pm - health - by feels like an asshole - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend to come hang out with me. He said he was busy and had to do homework. Since he never studies, I got suspicious and went to check up on him. I found him playing dress-up with his cat. He's 17. FML

#21421616
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28558) - you deserved it (4785)

On 06/06/2015 at 1:52am - animals - by iamfab - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

#21419654
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25684) - you deserved it (5213)

On 06/02/2015 at 11:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, and for the first time in months, I woke up feeling well rested and ready to face the day. At 7pm. FML

#21406879
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26743) - you deserved it (3508)

On 05/08/2015 at 5:32pm - health - by better late than never -

Today, my nurse girlfriend told me she's more attracted to the veins in my arm than any other part of me. FML

#21397356
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30043) - you deserved it (3614)

On 04/21/2015 at 9:48am - love - by veiny - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML

#21350749
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36031) - you deserved it (3662)

On 02/06/2015 at 2:06am - animals - by ZAnon - United States (Texas)

Today, my mum sat me down for a serious talk about not being home enough - not because she misses me, but because the family cat needs more stability in her life. FML

#21329522
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29966) - you deserved it (2620)

On 01/02/2015 at 7:11pm - animals - by cat co-parent - Australia



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