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Offline (the 08/27/2015 at 8:18am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 September 2000 (16 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1028
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 17 posted

About alanamarieg : cats.

alanamarieg's page activity

Visits<b>gar2014</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 7:40pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 11:44am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 9:18am<b>NoFightinDestiny</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 3:26pm<b>anthonydpalm</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 4:11pm<b>Bliepje</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 12:30pm<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:18am<b>Dasin6</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 4:19am<b>molloy2</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 12:34am<b>DBpiano</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 11:11pm<b>minimanion</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 6:18am<b>ShadowInsano</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 11:30pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 5:13am<b>pineapplejuicy</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 1:04am<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 7:27pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:10pm<b>idkwyatt</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 10:49pm<b>cmchappy</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 7:41pm

Fucked!<b>januswraith6</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:44pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 2:54pm<b>dirtbikeguy</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 6:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 12:59am<b>baba01</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:50am<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 4:17am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 1:14am<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 1:46pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:18am<b>byattwain</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 6:14am<b>davered89</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 2:34am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 12:17am<b>NebulaNick</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 8:48am<b>why_me2789</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 4:35pm<b>chivadz</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 9:24am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 2:44am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:59pm<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:15pm

alanamarieg's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of alanamarieg's badges

alanamarieg's favorite FMLs

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2015 at 11:08am / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my mom recently stopped taking her medication. I came home to find she'd shot my dog because she thought he was possessed by the devil. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 11:40am / Canada (Quebec) / Animals

Today, I was accused of shoplifting because my jacket looked "too chunky". I wasn't stealing, I'm just fat. FML

by goingtothegym / 12/08/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, even after loving him unconditionally, my originally 340 pound morbidly obese husband, who within the past two years lost almost 200 pounds, left me because now, he "can do so much better". FML

by heartbroken / 09/09/2013 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Love

Today, the window cleaner did his rounds at my house. I sat at my mirror applying makeup and doing my hair. When he came to my window, he yelled rather loudly, "Stop putting on a show for me, you dirty slut!" FML

by stillembarrassed / 08/06/2013 at 1:01pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I placed a Bible app next to an app I use for porn, in the hope that it will encourage me to watch less porn. I'm a girl. FML

by lilly1105 / 07/15/2013 at 9:19am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2013 at 12:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I met one of my favorite web-comic artists. As I purchased a shirt from their booth he asked, "What size?" I stupidly asked "How big is a small?" He chuckled, "It's small" and chuckled some more. So much for keeping it cool. FML

by stupidquestionsstupidpeople / 04/29/2013 at 11:32pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my room-mates were inspired by a TV show to make a "douchebag jar", into which we have to put money every time we say something obnoxious. It seems like I can't open my mouth without having to cough up £10. FML

by kay51 / 11/24/2012 at 1:41pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML

by ilovemymomma / 05/26/2012 at 3:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was jamming out in my car, tapping my fingers on the wheel and bobbing my head. At the next stoplight, I happened to look over and the passenger of the car next to me was holding a sign in the window saying, "I bet you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" FML

by brittbrat4 / 07/04/2011 at 8:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought it would be funny to jump in the pool while holding my cat. I am currently in the hospital due to the severe cuts on my face and throat. FML

by princev / 06/18/2011 at 6:32am / United States / Health

Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML

by crushed dreams / 06/16/2011 at 2:20am / United States / Intimacy