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ajackass

Offline (the 05/05/2015 at 8:23pm) | Search for a member

ajackass

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3472
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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ajackass's page activity

Visits<b>lashes_to_ashes</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 2:45am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 1:42am<b>dread514</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 8:09pm<b>Pearla</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 10:52pm<b>Blainathar</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 3:54pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 10:23pm<b>rich443</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:56pm<b>SarahCecelia</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 1:33pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 4:52pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 7:28pm<b>drago94</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 10:31pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 4:02am<b>neeena94</b> - the 06/10/2013 at 11:43pm

ajackass's FML badges

Consolation prize

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Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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ajackass's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. I told my boyfriend and my close family, who were all ecstatic. Then he told his mother. Her reaction? "It better come out looking like him." FML

Today, I had a group presentation. I kept zipping my jacket up and down nervously. As I waited for my turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me. I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket. I only had a bra on underneath. FML

Today, I found out that if someone flushes a toilet the same time I'm starting the washing machine, my house will flood. FML

#20844207
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42263) - you deserved it (2625)

On 08/19/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by Ben - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after an argument with my wife, I stormed out of our bedroom through the sliding doors to the balcony. Only there was no balcony, because it still hasn't been replaced yet. I'm now laid-up in hospital. FML

#20843350
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38480) - you deserved it (15139)

On 08/18/2013 at 4:13pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52359) - you deserved it (3136)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, while working as a swim instructor, I started singing the hokey pokey to get all the kids used to putting their faces in the water. One of the kids was covering his ears. When I asked him why, he said "because you were singing." He's 3. FML

#20842523
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40510) - you deserved it (6204)

On 08/18/2013 at 12:35am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, I went on a new medicine. One of the listed side-effects was "anal seepage" and I spent the better part of the day laughing with my coworkers about how it's "not a real side-effect". I found out that it really is while stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the way home. FML

#20839551
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40617) - you deserved it (9555)

On 08/15/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by stinky car - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mom came into my room to give me a goodbye kiss. Due to the routine of my girlfriend doing the exact same thing in the exact same spot, I held the kiss way longer than what a mother/son kiss should last. My mom actually had to tell me to "let go". FML

#20839296
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36380) - you deserved it (28273)

On 08/15/2013 at 9:06pm - misc - by deadman (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had an awful day and angrily threw a glass at the wall. Needless to say, I didn't feel like cleaning it up, and I took a nap, intending to do it later. I thought I would remember the bits of glass everywhere when I woke up. I didn't, but my feet soon did. FML

#20838843
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20192) - you deserved it (62415)

On 08/15/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML

#20838741
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51857) - you deserved it (3161)

On 08/15/2013 at 1:39pm - health - by Anonymous - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML

#20838395
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53975) - you deserved it (3899)

On 08/15/2013 at 5:47am - work - by bglenney - United States (California)

Today, my cousin texted me, asking how the chicken pizza had settled in my stomach. We got drunk last night and had pizza. I thought it was cheese; it was chicken. I've been vegetarian for 7 years. FML

#20838310
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29002) - you deserved it (45041)

On 08/15/2013 at 3:10am - misc - by Aly - United States (California)

Today, a guest of the private beach club I work at asked if I could do something about the water temperature in the ocean. I laughed, thinking it was a joke. She was serious and complained to my boss, saying I was absolutely no help. FML

#20837266
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43323) - you deserved it (2672)

On 08/14/2013 at 3:47pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
190 comments


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