Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ajackass

Search for a member

ajackass
  • Town/Country : US of A
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 835
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ajackass's last visitors

lashes_to_ashesjadeluvdread514PearlaBlainatharFaith13rich443SarahCeceliaWelshiteWizardo

ajackass's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of ajackass's badges

ajackass's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to infect a clean computer with a virus while looking up info on how to rid my other computer of the same virus. FML

#20992711
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34143) - you deserved it (6896)

On 12/14/2013 at 8:49pm - misc - by me (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, for my 18th birthday my mum gave me a black lace thong. I'm a guy. FML

#20992659
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36457) - you deserved it (3201)

On 12/14/2013 at 7:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

#20992325
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42907) - you deserved it (7376)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I got the DVD back from a dance concert I did. After watching it, I realised that I had a camel toe through the whole thing. Three and a half hours. FML

#20992052
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38935) - you deserved it (6030)

On 12/14/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Aggie_De (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I would like to thank the program designer that put "Set as home page" directly under "Remove from history". FML

#20991949
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36239) - you deserved it (9668)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by The_Rest_of_the_Story (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45172) - you deserved it (3955)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML

#20991671
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38238) - you deserved it (2989)

On 12/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by thank u usa (man) - Germany

Today, I got back the essay I wrote about how my country's education system is fucked. At one point, I made a spelling mistake. My teacher wrote a note about it, basically calling me illiterate and telling me to pay attention in school instead of whining about it. She misspelled "school". FML

#20990145
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39192) - you deserved it (3472)

On 12/12/2013 at 1:00pm - misc - by lrn2spel, teach (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

#20989946
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44457) - you deserved it (4884)

On 12/12/2013 at 6:27am - love - by Rumors - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while on my way to work, an elderly woman complimented me on my breast cancer scarf. I explained that my grandmother made one for all her female grandchildren before passing away two years ago. The woman then went psycho and almost strangled me in an attempt to steal it. FML

Today, I saw the guy who helped me yesterday when I was lost by telling me which bus to take. He came up to me and asked me how it went. I told him that the bus went the exact opposite way I wanted to go. He laughed and said, "I know." FML

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

#20988758
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39743) - you deserved it (6307)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found a credit card at my job. As store policy goes, we have to cut up lost cards immediately after finding them to protect the cardholders. As I grab the scissors and cut, my manager calls out, "Has anyone seen my credit card?" FML

#20988740
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42121) - you deserved it (9877)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:33am - work - by mariology (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, while trying to break up with my girlfriend, I somehow ended up begging her not to break up with me. I'm still not sure how that happened. FML

#20988052
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35201) - you deserved it (17596)

On 12/10/2013 at 6:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Bangladesh



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: