aisg

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Offline (the 09/07/2016 at 6:15am)

aisg

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5241
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About aisg : Nothing much to know, I use mobile so I probably won't see any messages

aisg's page activity

Visits<b>tonimari3</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 2:57am<b>lisaint</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 2:38pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 11:49pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 6:14pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 6:06pm<b>whatisntlove</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 12:07am<b>imbackwiththeshi</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 3:05pm<b>Fuzzbig</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 10:26am<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 3:24am<b>tay1axo</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 5:34am<b>hellryu</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 5:18am<b>mario2012</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 7:31pm<b>AwkwardShoe</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 5:01pm<b>AlaskaGabrielle</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 7:48pm<b>keerththana</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 1:33am<b>b3autyandbabes</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:11pm<b>GiovanniPaisa</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 4:46am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 11:56pm

Fucked!<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 12:06am

aisg's FML badges

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aisg's favorite FMLs

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2014 at 12:43pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm / United States / Love

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:47am / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

by took it / 02/09/2014 at 9:36am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

by sabz21 / 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML

by Ginger_Gawd / 01/20/2014 at 10:34pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

by Kaddiscott / 01/20/2014 at 5:12am / Italy (Trentino-Alto Adige) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2014 at 2:34am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

by anon / 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

by anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 1:38am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

by Elisa_LmR / 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I finally got proof of my theory when the dog came downstairs at 2 in the morning, looked me dead in the eye, pissed on the rug and took my socks before disappearing back upstairs. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 9:32pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Animals