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acommonman

Offline (the 08/26/2015 at 11:57pm) | Search for a member

acommonman

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 729
  • Number of comments : 107
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About acommonman : I'm just a common man. I prefer to remain unseen and unnoticed, and simply live life as passively as I can.

acommonman's page activity

Visits<b>Chibi_EB</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 6:42pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:57am<b>Stxsyh</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 1:42pm<b>Noremac42</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 10:10pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 4:34pm<b>MyNameIsBeats</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 9:38am<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 6:25pm<b>bakalov</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 11:10pm<b>waffleminer25</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 7:34am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 4:17pm<b>Supersid333</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 3:50pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 9:33am<b>eustonr</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 6:01am<b>MrBlackledge</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 4:55am<b>Thedumbnut</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 3:48am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 2:57am<b>Ashfyr</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:01am<b>teresa96706</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 11:09pm

Fucked!<b>FitFriday</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:58am<b>Dphill21</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 6:51am<b>dreamful_artist</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 1:38pm<b>WarPanda</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 4:51am<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 12:34am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 3:59pm

acommonman's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of acommonman's badges

acommonman's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML

#21418416
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31103) - you deserved it (4850)

On 05/31/2015 at 3:06am - intimacy - by bonehead69 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the bathroom that when I opened it, I accidentally peed a little. FML

#21415171
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27007) - you deserved it (11193)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the bathroom that when I opened it, I accidentally peed a little. FML

#21415171
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27007) - you deserved it (11193)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML

#21409928
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32642) - you deserved it (7090)

On 05/14/2015 at 8:42am - work - by HiddlePuff - Australia

Today, my 6-year-old daughter barged into the bathroom while I was peeing, inspected the toilet and said, "You're well hydrated, good job." FML

#21405462
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29381) - you deserved it (3710)

On 05/06/2015 at 1:22am - kids - by seethroughpee - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out the "sex noises" I heard from next door last night, which I'd angrily yelled at my neighbor for, were actually from him having an uncontrollable seizure. FML

#21405133
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30741) - you deserved it (13296)

On 05/05/2015 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by 420curse (man) - United States (California)

Today, because I thought I was about to have an asthma attack, I had a panic attack. Then, the panic attack caused me to have a real asthma attack. FML

#21378889
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28890) - you deserved it (3831)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:14am - health - by pikachu_43 - United States (California)

Today, my wedding venue called and canceled our reservation because we were double booked with a spaghetti bingo night, which they felt was more important. FML

#21361818
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34439) - you deserved it (2747)

On 02/23/2015 at 3:49pm - misc - by looking4newvenue (woman) - United States

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54119) - you deserved it (4743)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, my entire gym class had to run the 1600 with our coach calling out finishing times. My finishing time was reported as "3 days short of a year." FML

#20867471
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41404) - you deserved it (6931)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I suggestively asked my boyfriend to take a shower with me. He got in, washed himself, and got out, ignoring me the whole time. FML

#20852722
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53386) - you deserved it (7701)

On 08/24/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by -.- - United States

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

#20165510
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37639) - you deserved it (3826)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was so bored that I actually read the iTunes store's terms and conditions. FML

#20024681
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31541) - you deserved it (7521)

On 08/16/2012 at 3:50pm - misc - by cardsftw - United States (California)

Today, I was issued with a £60 fine for being parked in a supermarket car-park for more than 3 hours. I work there. FML



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