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aback

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aback
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 153722
  • Number of comments : 2175
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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aback's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Beginner

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Consolation prize

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aback's favorite FMLs

Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML

#19489197
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22736) - you deserved it (5679)

On 04/18/2012 at 9:43am - misc - by Fartfail (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML

#19470748
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6944) - you deserved it (29631)

On 04/15/2012 at 2:49am - love - by needurlove (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML

#19468154
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16835) - you deserved it (10103)

On 04/14/2012 at 6:56pm - misc - by fuckbucket14 - Egypt (Al Bahr al Ahmar)

Today, despite the fact that I'm really sick, my mom insisted that I come home and help babysit my cousins this weekend. When I got there, everyone else took off to do "errands," leaving me with three hyperactive, howler monkey-like children to deal with. FML

#19467974
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17528) - you deserved it (2040)

On 04/14/2012 at 6:19pm - kids - by Rory - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "new pirate" in the office. FML

#19408949
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11595) - you deserved it (16607)

On 04/04/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized that something's wrong when you have to go to a mental hospital for a family reunion. FML

#19367140
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21743) - you deserved it (1572)

On 03/28/2012 at 10:53pm - misc - by neverthesame - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

#19320311
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9556) - you deserved it (59526)

On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22424) - you deserved it (3982)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23301) - you deserved it (6312)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26002) - you deserved it (5669)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on my dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whirled around and yelled "BOO!" causing me to scream like a little bitch. FML

#19263834
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5198) - you deserved it (23376)

On 03/12/2012 at 10:55am - misc - by gengiskarn69 (man) - United States

Today, I was at a meeting. One of the other members decided to share that their cat had passed away recently. I got an uncontrollable nervous laugh, started crying because I was laughing so hard, and left the room while everyone watched in horror. FML

#19237178
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10498) - you deserved it (17920)

On 03/08/2012 at 12:47am - work - by Honey Badger (woman) - United States

Today, my new roommate told me he was bisexual. A little concerned, I opened up and told him that made me uncomfortable. His reply: "Oh don't worry, I'm only attracted to good looking guys." FML

#19232371
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10641) - you deserved it (40829)

On 03/07/2012 at 9:01am - misc - by Leland - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while my plane took off, I was forced to sit and watch as somebody rear-ended my car in the parking lot. FML

#19207199
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (712) - you deserved it (1640)

On 03/03/2012 at 2:33am - money - by Sean - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was chatting to my brother on Skype. Out of the blue, and just as I read the punchline to a hilarious joke, he said his girlfriend had been cheating on him. I couldn't stifle my side-splitting laughter, and he's been ignoring my calls since. FML

#19205582
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19599) - you deserved it (8322)

On 03/02/2012 at 10:05pm - love - by Anonymous - United States



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