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Offline (the 05/09/2016 at 2:23pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 19 August 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1469
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About a_wiener_d0g : I'm 19, work at a vet. Bout the most interesting things about me.

a_wiener_d0g's page activity

Visits<b>XbladeX99</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 9:13am<b>DominicChiabotti</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 1:22pm<b>men_who_say_ni</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 11:21am<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 9:14pm<b>vikky538</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 8:37pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:05am<b>keithsbooty</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 8:10pm<b>captain_nessness</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 9:59am<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 4:22am<b>bbackensto</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 12:14am<b>Swandive235</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 10:38pm<b>Jess0331</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Isaiah80008</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 6:17pm<b>f36k</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 6:01pm<b>berthiaume27</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 3:36pm<b>couwa12</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 1:52pm<b>MelodySackett123</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 9:39pm<b>TrippingOnAcid</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 6:02pm

Fucked!<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 10:22am<b>MelodySackett123</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 3:40am<b>alwaysstabbing</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:53pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 2:31am<b>keithsbooty</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 7:47pm<b>C00kiesNcream</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:53pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:30am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 7:59pm<b>summer135790</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 12:18pm<b>beautybubblez</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 4:49pm<b>mydumblifesucks</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 6:01pm<b>okibi1</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:36pm<b>FamousPeace</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:42am<b>jullestrann</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:36am

a_wiener_d0g's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of a_wiener_d0g's badges

a_wiener_d0g's favorite FMLs

Today, my stepbrother's attempt at making a snack resulted in the microwave catching on fire and the everlasting smell of burnt pizza rolls. FML

by Tyrez / 08/14/2015 at 7:38pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend asked me if I had any kinks, so I told him all about them. He was actually mad because I didn't have the same 'sexy kinks' the girls in porn have. FML

by maybe if i was paid like them i would / 08/14/2015 at 6:42pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, at work I had to explain to a client that male dogs can wear red collars and it doesn't make them "gay". The client then got angry and stormed out of the store, causing me to get written up. FML

by Holyguacamoly / 05/27/2014 at 7:15am / Iceland / Animals

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2014 at 7:37am / United Kingdom (Wolverhampton) / Kids

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

by chumman / 05/06/2014 at 9:55am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was waiting on a Canadian tourist at work, and he bought some of the most expensive stuff on the menu. I was excited about maybe getting a big tip, so I casually said that in the USA, waiters make most of our money off tips. The guy just snorted, "Sucks to be American, eh?!" and left. FML

by yes, yes it does :( / 04/30/2014 at 5:11pm / United States / Work

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

by now have a cat / 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm / Norway (Nordland) / Work

Today, I took my car into a car wash. I guess it was a bad idea to do it with my dog in the car, because he freaked out, started scrambling around, and ended up pissing on everything, me included. FML

by hold your horses pony boy / 04/18/2014 at 2:24pm / United States / Animals

Today, I witnessed my roommate telling a girl that he has "really healthy shits". I wanted to make fun of him, but he got laid by said girl and I went home to jerk off. FML

by damn / 04/09/2014 at 5:12pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I followed my wife out, since she's been acting strangely lately and I was suspicious. She met up with a guy at a restaurant, who she later claimed was her brother. Either she's cheating on me, or it's tradition in her family to make out and grope each other at the end of meals. FML

by broken vows / 03/15/2014 at 5:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last 2 miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML

by rolypoly / 03/05/2014 at 7:33am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, my friends convinced me to go out clubbing with them for the first time. "You'll get some action", they said. The only action I got was some drunk bloke staggering into me and spraying me with vomit just minutes after arriving. FML

by thanks, cunt-o / 03/01/2014 at 12:23pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cleaning the bathrooms at work. An older gentlemen came in and needed to use it. He said to me "Oh no, PLEASE stay, just don't look." I don't get paid enough for this. FML

by sarad206 / 02/19/2014 at 4:09pm / United States / Work

Today, in revenge for being grounded for bullying a kid at school, my eight-year-old son flung a handful of Lego in my path as I walked barefoot into the kitchen. I'm still in pain. 5ML

by limping / 01/24/2014 at 6:10pm / Canada / Kids