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a_dean87's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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a_dean87's favorite FMLs
by fuck teh poleese / 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned that when microwaveable pizzas say "Caution, hot after cooking" what they really mean is that you should be prepared for the cardboard tray to fall apart when you try to pick it up and that boiling hot cheese is going to run down your arm. FML
by ohforcheese / 01/19/2012 at 3:19pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Health
Today, I was shopping in a packed store when I started to feel faint. Since I was quite far along in the queue, I tried to hold out until I reached the front of the queue. Good news: I succeeded. Bad news: I then fainted at the counter, hit my nose, and shit myself. FML
by everyonewasstaring / 12/22/2009 at 6:32pm / United Kingdom (Croydon) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML
by dearme / 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health
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- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, after recently moving to Australia, I saw my first kangaroo. In the refrigerated section of… Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of… Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he…