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Zimonada

Offline (the 05/24/2015 at 6:08am) | Search for a member

Zimonada

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7451
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Zimonada's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 4:20am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:27am<b>Freeze</b> - the 03/15/2010 at 11:19pm<b>no1sbusiness</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 3:32pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 6:15pm<b>ibabyd0llaz</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 9:58pm<b>annoyedwife5</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 10:54am

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Zimonada's favorite FMLs

Today, I received 46 emails from co-workers who were using reply-all to tell everyone else not to use reply-all. FML

#21413067
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22153) - you deserved it (1684)

On 05/20/2015 at 2:47pm - work - by farf -

Today, I heard a loud beep for over an hour. It didn't come from my phone or even an alarm of some sort. It was my son pretending to be a smoke alarm. FML

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for public sex. FML

#21399557
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38666) - you deserved it (2784)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm - love - by RBergman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my little sister filled the huge house I spent over a week building in Minecraft with TNT. She then demanded I give her all the money in my wallet, or she'd blow it all up. She's now $86.25 richer, and my parents think it's too hilarious to make her give me my money back. FML

#21399271
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25822) - you deserved it (22584)

On 04/24/2015 at 11:23pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that, given the correct velocity, a used condom can actually fly through a tiny window and slap you on the leg. I also found out that when you go to the window to yell at the perpetrator, they might have more ammunition. FML

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

#21392789
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35408) - you deserved it (2354)

On 04/13/2015 at 5:00am - misc - by yupthissucks - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

#21390758
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28100) - you deserved it (4611)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17307) - you deserved it (32329)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38257) - you deserved it (3124)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was doing homework and I had my leg bent in a funny position. When I stood up, my hip dislocated. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. When people ask me what happened, I have to say I dislocated my hip doing calculus. FML

#21381072
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27855) - you deserved it (2777)

On 03/25/2015 at 12:24am - health - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom and I made the bad decision to go hiking for some mother-daughter bonding even though we had little experience. My mother tumbled down a mountain named Tumbledown and I couldn't even enjoy the irony because I had to half carry her all the way back to the car. FML

#21375957
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27601) - you deserved it (3298)

On 03/16/2015 at 8:56pm - health - by manderpander21 - United States (New York)

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (263) - you deserved it (48184)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, my brother was doing an extremely annoying Shrek impression, so I turned the TV on in a desperate attempt to drown him out. You'll never guess what movie was on. FML

#21369958
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105) - you deserved it (13)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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