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Zimonada

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Zimonada

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7637
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Zimonada's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 4:20am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:27am<b>Freeze</b> - the 03/15/2010 at 11:19pm<b>no1sbusiness</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 3:32pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 6:15pm<b>ibabyd0llaz</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 9:58pm<b>annoyedwife5</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 10:54am

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Zimonada's favorite FMLs

Today, after all of the business cards for the car dealership that I work for were printed, the phone number was wrong, and the lady got so pissed about getting so many calls that she told them that they had won a free car. I had to tell dozens of ecstatic customers that they hadn't. FML

#21430788
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21539) - you deserved it (5131)

On 06/23/2015 at 6:37pm - work - by Luke - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to eat dinner with his parents. Everyone wanted me to start the family prayer, and although I hadn't done one in years, I accepted. It went well until I remembered you say "Amen" at the end, not "Uh... Bye." FML

#21430513
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24240) - you deserved it (5227)

On 06/23/2015 at 2:37am - misc - by Arcanin3Boss (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went out to eat. When I walked into the restaurant, a lady approached me and said she'd seat me soon. After a long wait, I saw that same lady leave. Then I realized she didn't actually work there and was just screwing with me. FML

#21426994
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28867) - you deserved it (2993)

On 06/16/2015 at 12:13pm - misc - by VHBJ - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to endure the most mortifying ambulance ride of my life after my fiancé's cock ring got stuck on my tongue piercing. As I was trying not to choke or vomit, he actually high-fived one of the EMTs and tried to get him to take a picture on his phone. FML

#21424446
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29543) - you deserved it (8588)

On 06/11/2015 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by awkward - United Kingdom (Dumfries and Galloway)

Today, frustrated with my very energetic kids, I told them that if they dug a hole deep enough in the backyard, they'd find China. What they really found was the previous owner's dog. FML

#21419303
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28389) - you deserved it (7101)

On 06/01/2015 at 6:45pm - kids - by pheonixxe (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I received 46 emails from co-workers who were using reply-all to tell everyone else not to use reply-all. FML

#21413067
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23409) - you deserved it (1713)

On 05/20/2015 at 2:47pm - work - by farf -

Today, I heard a loud beep for over an hour. It didn't come from my phone or even an alarm of some sort. It was my son pretending to be a smoke alarm. FML

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for public sex. FML

#21399557
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38881) - you deserved it (2790)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm - love - by RBergman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my little sister filled the huge house I spent over a week building in Minecraft with TNT. She then demanded I give her all the money in my wallet, or she'd blow it all up. She's now $86.25 richer, and my parents think it's too hilarious to make her give me my money back. FML

#21399271
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25918) - you deserved it (22667)

On 04/24/2015 at 11:23pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that, given the correct velocity, a used condom can actually fly through a tiny window and slap you on the leg. I also found out that when you go to the window to yell at the perpetrator, they might have more ammunition. FML

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

#21392789
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35454) - you deserved it (2355)

On 04/13/2015 at 5:00am - misc - by yupthissucks - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

#21390758
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28164) - you deserved it (4618)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17324) - you deserved it (32366)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39175) - you deserved it (3369)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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