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Zeus99

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Zeus99

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4168
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Zeus99's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:23pm

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Zeus99's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML

#21524473
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18142) - you deserved it (2072)

On 02/09/2016 at 4:51pm - intimacy - by hannieannie - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I found out that the guy I've been crushing on for months is actually 15 years old. I'm 22. Not only is it gross, but it's also illegal. FML

#21524349
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18604) - you deserved it (3786)

On 02/09/2016 at 8:08am - love - by abnormallyadam - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I tried to be sexy by pulling down my girlfriend's panties with my teeth. I didn't expect to be faced with the mother of all shit stains and start gagging so bad I nearly puked. FML

#21522398
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25374) - you deserved it (3633)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:40am - intimacy - by :x (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I visited my 90-year-old great-grandmother and her boyfriend. This wouldn't be a problem, if this boyfriend wasn't different than the one she had yesterday. She told me not to tell him about "the other one". FML

#21521764
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19378) - you deserved it (1446)

On 02/01/2016 at 11:37am - love - by anon (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my son's new habit. Sticking his finger up his ass, farting on it, and smelling it. Apparently, the scent is the purest then. FML

#21521749
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21341) - you deserved it (2032)

On 02/01/2016 at 10:54am - kids - by notsoproudfather - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

#21521379
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23271) - you deserved it (5039)

On 01/31/2016 at 4:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I randomly got a boner while modeling a character's butt in animation class. FML

#21520891
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17662) - you deserved it (3203)

On 01/29/2016 at 5:53pm - misc - by Why (man) -

Today, my girlfriend made a patronising post on Facebook, "to all you guys out there" saying how having sex with a drunk person is straight-up, 100% rape. I pointed out that she's had sex with me several times after I've come home drunk. That pissed her off. Now I'm single. FML

#21520025
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22617) - you deserved it (4337)

On 01/27/2016 at 10:35am - misc - by 404: Sanity Not Found (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my friends and I were goofing off playing tag behind the local church, when I heard a banshee-like wail behind me. Assuming it was one of my friends, I wailed right back and ran. Turned out there was actually a funeral going on, and the wail was from one of the bereaved. FML

#21520005
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17689) - you deserved it (7263)

On 01/27/2016 at 8:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out my family refers to my room as "the virgin cave". FML

#21518755
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21522) - you deserved it (2569)

On 01/24/2016 at 12:40am - misc - by Dexter_39476 (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my pubic hairs were poking into my wang, I went to scratch it. Something bit my hand. FML

#21518044
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20156) - you deserved it (7662)

On 01/22/2016 at 12:47am - animals - by swag papi - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was starting to get freaky with my boyfriend when his dad came in with no warning to let the dog into my boyfriend's bedroom. His dad noticed what was going on and covered the dog's eyes instead of just leaving. FML

#21517614
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20563) - you deserved it (3225)

On 01/20/2016 at 11:41pm - intimacy - by Garfield - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML

#21516257
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20568) - you deserved it (3240)

On 01/17/2016 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got a call from my dad asking if I was a porno actress. I am. FML

#21510678
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25353) - you deserved it (22368)

On 01/02/2016 at 5:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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