ZeroG57

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ZeroG57

1Fucked!

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  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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ZeroG57's page activity

Visits<b>rajnidevraj1996</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 12:09pm<b>kaymarfs</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 6:39pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 2:21pm

Fucked!<b>kaymarfs</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 12:39am

ZeroG57's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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ZeroG57's favorite FMLs

Today, a cute guy complimented me on my legs. I, being the awkward person that I am, panicked and replied, "Thanks, I grew them myself." FML

by Randomspaghetti / 09/15/2016 at 5:11pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting two brothers, 3 and 5. As I was getting the youngest ready to go outside, the older boy, threw open the door, shucked his clothing, and ran off into the woods. I had to carry the 3-year-old as I ran my asthmatic ass after him. FML

by K_nightlight / 09/14/2016 at 8:20pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to work early and saw my crush's car in the parking lot, so I parked next to her. After that, I looked over at her car to see her staring at me with a weird look and her saying, "Really?" Then she gestured around the lot; I looked around to find it completely empty. FML

by Asshole Parker / 09/06/2016 at 7:01am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my aunt said that it looked like I lost some weight. I was pleased with this, since I've been trying to lose some. My mom, for some reason, thought it was insulting. She pulled me to aside to assure me that I most definitely don't look any skinnier. FML

by eliinu / 09/01/2016 at 10:45pm / United States (Kentucky) / Health

Today, my family and I finally moved out of our apartment, and into a more accommodating house. However, as we were leaving, my brother leans over and whispers in my ear, "I've masturbated in every room of that apartment, but it was the best in your room." We've lived there for 3 years. FML

by Rowaelin16 / 08/22/2016 at 10:50pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I farted so loud that my cat thought that I was growling at him, and bit me in self-defense. FML

by nullpointer / 08/03/2016 at 12:38am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my mom told me that I'll never get married if my cooking skills don't improve. My boyfriend agrees. FML

by :( / 07/31/2016 at 12:18am / United States / Love

Today, I told my husband that I think he has ADHD. He was offended and began to argue, then he got distracted by a dog outside. FML

by hannamacintosh / 07/25/2016 at 10:13am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I had to deal with yet another day of people looking at my name tag and saying "You know nothing, John Snow." with a shit-eating grin, like they're the wittiest people alive. Then I had to deal with my boss telling me to lighten up, because it's "just a joke". FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2016 at 1:19pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Work

Today, my iguana tried to eat my hand. Taking that as a sign of being hungry, I gave him a bowl of fruits and veggies. After he finished the bowl, he tried to eat my hand again. My iguana's an asshole. FML

by Geckosrock99 / 07/20/2016 at 1:58am / Animals

Today, I finally finished a gruelling shift at the hospital. I hadn't slept in over 30 hours, so I was happy to get out. I was quickly rushed back in after I collapsed in the parking lot and cracked my head open. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2016 at 11:16am / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, two people came up to me at school, asking if I'd sell them some of my Adderall. I only just transferred here and have never mentioned my ADHD or the Adderall I take for it to anyone. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2016 at 12:33pm / Health

Today, my girlfriend and I found out that if I'm tickled it causes me to have a panic attack until I cry. FML

by RIP / 06/18/2016 at 7:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a kitten. She decided to sleep on my bed, waking me up periodically during the night by biting my face to make sure I was still alive. FML

by inveralaska / 06/16/2016 at 5:22pm / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, I went to the bathroom in a mall. As I was in the stall, a woman tried to open it. I yelled out that's it was occupied but she kept shaking it to open it. It came up to the point where she had to crawl under the door to see that I was there. FML

by ReineXre / 06/14/2016 at 8:00pm / Miscellaneous