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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 November 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14489
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Zenma's page activity

Visits<b>EvilPandaxD</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 3:02pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 10:03pm<b>Mortoli</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 12:50am<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 9:22am<b>potatopolice1025</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:10am<b>JellyJace</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 3:18pm<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 11:22am<b>pooboos</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 4:58pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 3:00pm<b>XxduckiexX</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 1:19am<b>TheComedyAudio</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 5:07pm<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 12:28am<b>sarah1024</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 3:35pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 5:16am<b>DaBomb1997</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 9:20am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:53pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:51am<b>FoxOnTheStreet</b> - the 08/14/2010 at 5:15pm

Fucked!<b>JellyJace</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 9:18pm

Zenma's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Zenma's favorite FMLs

Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2010 at 10:16pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, I had a 10 hour drive to Las Vegas with only 2 CDs, Taylor Swift and Jason Mraz, and my girlfriend who thinks she's a good singer. FML

by Username / 01/27/2010 at 3:35am / Transportation

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

by E.S. / 10/23/2009 at 1:01am / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

by oxjessiiox / 10/11/2009 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got back from vacation and realised I still had the motel key. The key-ring has the address on it, so you can post it back to them. I drove to the postbox and posted the key. I then discovered that the motel key won't start my car. FML

by fmlxxxx / 09/23/2009 at 9:15am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Holidays

Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2009 at 8:08am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm / United States (Arizona) / Holidays

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

by JuicyJohn / 09/08/2009 at 9:33pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML

by pussyOUT / 09/01/2009 at 2:30am / United States / Health

Today, I was taking a piss in a port-o-john and thought it would be a good idea to aim at a bee I saw buzzing around. The bee thought it would be a better idea to sting me on the knob. FML

by Bee / 08/31/2009 at 12:28pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML

by maidmyday / 08/12/2009 at 10:25am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML

by ahhahaha / 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm / United States (New Mexico) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my brother's best friend spent the night and was changing with the door partially open. He's super hot and as I was watching him change, he sneezed. Forgetting he didn't know I was watching him, I said bless you. He called me a freak, slammed the door in my face and told my parents. FML

by jeeperspeepers / 08/02/2009 at 6:03pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a check-up with my dermatologist. When I took off my pants, she noticed a small mark on my penis and was concerned. I had to inform her that it was not in fact a mole, but a bruise from getting it stuck in a Snapple bottle two days prior to the check-up. FML

by Best-stuf-on-Earth / 07/12/2009 at 3:07am / United States (California) / Health