Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Kuopio, Finland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 9 June 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1051
  • Number of comments : 95
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 33 posted

About Zarcissa : Don't worry, I won't bite... hard. Maybe.

Zarcissa's page activity

Visits<b>BigxXxDeal</b> - yesterday at 9:18pm<b>charmedamethyst</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 7:45pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 6:07pm<b>lurch87</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 3:45pm<b>jenninator93</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 9:11am<b>classicsparkles</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 1:48am<b>bobjope</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 10:37pm<b>I_am_GIR</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 8:08pm<b>buenos24</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 5:33pm<b>blade9502</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 5:15pm<b>hilamonster06</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 2:55pm<b>BaconForAll</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 8:57am<b>Doutze</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 7:17am<b>Scryll</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 2:51pm<b>AnOriginalName</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 2:29pm<b>AlpacaKing</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 5:17am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 4:04pm<b>slender_gab</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 4:56pm

Liked!<b>bobjope</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 3:37am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 5:03am<b>DJ_Pelco</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 2:45am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 4:08pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 2:44pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 1:25pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 1:20pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 4:38am<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 7:51pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 2:11pm<b>chivadz</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 9:50am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 7:25pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 4:26pm<b>KittehFreak</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 4:57am<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:26am<b>marythecat333</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 9:40pm<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 5:28pm<b>Misskreher</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 3:10pm

Zarcissa's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of Zarcissa's badges

Zarcissa's favorite FMLs

Today, mah boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52928) - you deserved it (8361)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today I fartd so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41905) - you deserved it (6912)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I collected mah new timetable at college only to find I've been dropped from all mah classes. I've been listed as deceased. I'm definitely not dead an have no idea how I supposedly died. big fat FML


I agree, your life sucks (50203) - you deserved it (2598)

On 09/04/2013 at 11:59am - work - by resurrected - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today,hile I was teaching mah chickens to eat out of mah hand, one of the hens bit mah finger and I dropped the entre handful of treats. Result: bonanza 4 the brd. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

Today, at karate, sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57950) - you deserved it (4864)

On 06/01/2013 at 12:31am - health - by Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina (woman) - United States (California)

Taday my older brother walkd in on mehile I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. mega FML


I agree, your life sucks (22626) - you deserved it (66242)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by SayCheese - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at ma workplace, I saw a system crasing. I mean literally, ma manager was trowing ma colleague's laptop at im wile souting around te office. Tis is only ma second day. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20806) - you deserved it (1501)

On 06/10/2012 at 9:14pm - work - by in_hardik - United States

today I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22115) - you deserved it (6318)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on mah dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whrld around an yelld ( BOO! ) causing me to scream lyk a little bitch. FML


I agree, your life sucks (7067) - you deserved it (33380)

On 03/12/2012 at 10:55am - misc - by gengiskarn69 (man) - United States

I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9198) - you deserved it (28691)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by WayTooMuchFacebook (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I Was Using A Restroom When I Hered Someone Sneeze . I Said, "Bless You." It Happened Again About Three Times, So I Repeated Myself Each Time . I Then Noticed It Was An Automatic Air Freshener . FML


I agree, your life sucks (15907) - you deserved it (22796)

On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally told mah mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML


I agree, your life sucks (17352) - you deserved it (21935)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today... my girlfriend shoved a Q-tip up my asshile I was brushing my teeth. fat FML


I agree, your life sucks (35442) - you deserved it (6645)

On 12/06/2011 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by Surprisebuttsecks? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I Took Mah Girlfriend Out Fir Dinner To A Fancy Italian Restaurant Fir Our One Year Anniversary!! After Giving Her Some Roses, Freshly Baked Cookies, And A Thoughtful Poem I Wrote Fir Her, She Started Laughing And Asked Fir Her Real Gift!! FML


I agree, your life sucks (45840) - you deserved it (6606)

On 11/09/2011 at 3:00pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada

Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: