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Offline (the 05/15/2016 at 2:36pm)



  • Town/Country : Kuopio, Finland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 9 June 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2752
  • Number of comments : 231
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 33 posted

About Zarcissa : Don't worry, I won't bite... hard. Maybe.

Zarcissa's page activity

Visits<b>sazarath</b> - the 12/01/2016 at 1:59am<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 11:38am<b>smokeduck115</b> - the 11/05/2016 at 3:03am<b>heroqucas</b> - the 10/29/2016 at 4:51am<b>prinsk76</b> - the 10/27/2016 at 11:27pm<b>tabbitha93</b> - the 10/19/2016 at 3:34am<b>Rynardhell</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 5:53pm<b>james08</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 7:43am<b>Poyzin7323</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 6:47pm<b>Willman757</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 3:24pm<b>Thebroskii</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 9:30pm<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 5:35pm<b>TheGoatTamer</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 5:35pm<b>conman317</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 5:27am<b>MousE0910</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 12:12am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 9:56am<b>clines42</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 11:15pm<b>arealsexybitch</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 6:28pm

Fucked!<b>FML_SideWays69</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 7:51pm<b>hullarms</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 9:42am<b>zainman13</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 8:37am<b>aelabed</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 4:52am<b>Radgears47</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 10:16pm<b>aabhasj</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:54pm<b>lahutchins</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 7:10pm<b>csjc</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 7:19pm<b>infantrysoldier</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 1:26am<b>mthurston</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 2:09am<b>psmith78332</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 3:24pm<b>dumboleredneck</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 1:34am<b>thebighurt</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 6:01pm<b>lfrider92</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 9:26am<b>lukian</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:52am<b>pop17123</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:41pm<b>alphasmartass93</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 5:55pm<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 5:20pm

Zarcissa's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of Zarcissa's badges

Zarcissa's favorite FMLs

Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML

by [...] / 12/12/2013 at 9:28am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

by pootie / 12/11/2013 at 8:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I collected my new timetable at college only to find I've been dropped from all my classes. I've been listed as deceased. I'm definitely not dead and have no idea how I supposedly died. FML

by resurrected / 09/04/2013 at 11:59am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Work

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

by Rapunzel1974 / 09/01/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Mississippi) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

by Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina / 06/01/2013 at 12:31am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML

by SayCheese / 04/02/2013 at 6:52pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my workplace, I saw a system crashing. I mean literally, my manager was throwing my colleague's laptop at him while shouting around the office. This is only my second day. FML

by in_hardik / 06/10/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Work

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm / United States / Money

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on my dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whirled around and yelled "BOO!" causing me to scream like a little bitch. FML

by gengiskarn69 / 03/12/2012 at 10:55am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML

by WayTooMuchFacebook / 02/04/2012 at 12:07am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

by coleslaw / 02/03/2012 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

by Anonymous / 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm / India / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend shoved a Q-tip up my ass while I was brushing my teeth. FML

by Surprisebuttsecks? / 12/06/2011 at 11:39pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2011 at 3:00pm / Canada / Love