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YoshiEgg

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YoshiEgg
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 338
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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YoshiEgg's favorite FMLs

Today, I wore my new Brazilian thong bikini to the pool for the first time. I was lying face down feeling so sexy, until flies started buzzing my butt. FML

#19344343
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7313) - you deserved it (28360)

On 03/25/2012 at 11:34am - misc - by BookBabe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

#19285505
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29562) - you deserved it (4161)

On 03/15/2012 at 10:21pm - love - by spermbankonlegs (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met my ex's new boyfriend. I was at work, cashiering at the movie theater that they were apparently having their first date at. We broke up less than 24 hours ago. FML

#18663308
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26887) - you deserved it (2057)

On 12/31/2011 at 12:09pm - love - by TheBeastSwaq - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided to raid my games collection and try her hand at Amnesia: The Dark Descent. Two hours later, despite my best attempts to make her stop shrieking like a dying crackhead every two minutes, two cops showed up at the door with our neighbors in tow. FML

#18657725
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20546) - you deserved it (2398)

On 12/30/2011 at 9:43pm - misc - by axel519 (man) - United States

Today, I started at my new waitressing job. Our uniforms have the name of the restaurant on the left chest pocket. My first customer asked me what the other boob was called. FML

#18443540
97 comments

Today, my parents took away my laptop, TV, Xbox, and car all because I broke up with my girlfriend. They said when I patch things up with her, I can have my stuff back. FML

#17842672
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31969) - you deserved it (4604)

On 09/26/2011 at 9:10pm - love - by faded as shit - United States

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

#17761729
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23254) - you deserved it (3963)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my mom showed up completely hammered to a party I was throwing. The party was to celebrate the ten years that I've been sober. FML

#17486446
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28167) - you deserved it (2266)

On 08/16/2011 at 12:54am - health - by Jillian Drute - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, at work in a liquor store, a man came in to demand a refund because after he "drank the whole bottle of Jack" he "couldn't get it up" for his wife. He thought that alcohol was supposed to be an aphrodisiac, and blamed me personally for his "whiskey dick". FML

#17415009
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26323) - you deserved it (2318)

On 08/09/2011 at 2:24am - intimacy - by OyGeeze28 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went into a crowded store and tried out a blazer. I was thinking to myself how hot I looked in it when the manager tapped me on the shoulder and politely said, "Excuse me sir, that's a ladies' blazer." FML

#17374086
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23215) - you deserved it (9179)

On 08/05/2011 at 1:45am - misc - by Fred - Japan

Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

#17190246
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34937) - you deserved it (10176)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML

#16508942
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60532) - you deserved it (3538)

On 06/05/2011 at 1:17am - love - by dumped - United States (Utah)

Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML

#15430583
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18608) - you deserved it (11025)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:39am - health - by Maddie -

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34819) - you deserved it (30431)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, a frog made my hot tub his new home. I can't stand frogs and he moves lightening fast. I think the only way to get rid of him is to turn the heat on and boil him. Which I would do if my daughter didn't already adore him. FML

#15312414
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24728) - you deserved it (9721)

On 03/14/2011 at 8:57pm - kids - by BSwan (woman) - Australia



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