About Ylianaxoxo : Stop reading this..
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Ylianaxoxo's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML
by Anonymous / 04/05/2014 at 7:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
by as-salamu alaykum, motherfucker / 04/05/2014 at 6:04pm / United Kingdom (Wirral) / Miscellaneous
by Welshite / 04/03/2014 at 4:53pm / United States / Work
Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML
by I Have Failed / 04/02/2014 at 4:10pm / Spain (Madrid) / Kids
by derped-out sperm / 04/01/2014 at 5:41pm / Ireland / Kids
by ohdear. / 03/29/2014 at 7:07pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
Today, I was watching last week's episode of The Walking Dead with my girlfriend. When the gang leader explained the rules of the group to Daryl, I reached over, grabbed my girlfriend's boobs and yelled, "Claimed!" She shot back, "Yeah, they are. But not by you." FML
by the other guy? / 03/29/2014 at 5:57pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/28/2014 at 4:30pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, a would-be customer practically kicked my store door in, then got pissed and started throwing around insults after I told him that we were still closed, hence the closed sign. He claimed the sign was "confusing". FML
by IDIOT / 03/28/2014 at 4:11pm / United States / Work
by mookiemookie01 / 03/27/2014 at 6:34pm / Miscellaneous
by shabowbow / 03/27/2014 at 2:14pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by bonbon789 / 03/27/2014 at 2:10pm / United States / Health
by KennyJF7 / 03/14/2014 at 10:43pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, my friend told me that 50% of all marriages end in divorce. Since he's my friend, I didn't want to call him out too bad, so I joked that 90% of statistics are made up on the spot. He called me an idiot and lectured me on how I'd just made that figure up myself. I need new friends. FML
by Anonymous / 03/14/2014 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/14/2014 at 1:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding… Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to… Today, at work, my husband came in and brought me flowers and a card for our anniversary. I opened…