About Xanster82 : Fatty.
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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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Xanster82's favorite FMLs
by duckthisspit / 10/31/2015 at 11:23pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Money
by guessthatsatrickthen / 10/31/2015 at 1:19pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Miscellaneous
by Fat Jon / 10/29/2015 at 3:43pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was supposed to start my vacation in Italy. I guess not everyone heard that I canceled it due to health problems, because this morning I caught two of my "friends" unplugging my TV after breaking into my house. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2015 at 11:28am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up at 2am and went to use the toilet. I sat there doing my business, when I heard a voice whisper my name from behind me. I live alone and the toilet is right up against the wall. I screamed and ran back to my room, then went without sleep for the rest of the night. FML
by haunted / 10/23/2015 at 4:41pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by CalebLawrence / 10/22/2015 at 7:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/21/2015 at 8:12am / Philippines (Quezon City) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/13/2015 at 3:35am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by MeaganElizabethM / 10/11/2015 at 8:31am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, while waiting in line to get my medication, a man who just got his prescription looked me up and down and said "Penis pills, right? Ya look like the type." Then he walked out as a couple of other guys in line started snickering. FML
by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 2:45am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/07/2015 at 9:45am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Work
Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I found out I have diabetes. She thought it was an STD and I had cheated on her. So I explained what it really was and she dumped me again because she didn't want her future children to inherit my fucked up DNA. FML
by Guy / 09/28/2015 at 2:49pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Miscellaneous
Today, while on my first ever date, I ordered a really hot curry, hoping to impress my date. "Yeah," I said smoothly, "not everyone can handle spicy food." When I took a bite, my eyes watered, my mouth burned, and I had to plead for water in between moaning like a dying baboon. FML
by halfie / 09/26/2015 at 1:06am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got an angry call from my 7-year-old son's school. It turned out that while doing a "what I want to be when I'm older" assignment, he wrote that he wants to be an internet troll so he can make people mad and make them kill themselves. FML
by Anonymous / 09/23/2015 at 11:48am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
by amburrjade / 09/22/2015 at 1:18am / United States (Texas) / Geek
- Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very… Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the… Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I…