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Watermelon2011

Offline (the 03/18/2015 at 6:46pm) | Search for a member

Watermelon2011

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1993
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Watermelon2011's page activity

Visits<b>shelzykid</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 12:28am<b>KayDee29</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 8:57pm<b>rieebee</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 1:56pm<b>dragonkisses28</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 12:45am<b>aruam365</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 11:21pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 6:08pm<b>TurquoiseJesus</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 7:44pm<b>abombination</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 12:23am<b>julesvasquez</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:02pm<b>Kittiecat511</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:25pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:25pm<b>idkyiam</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 9:34pm<b>josiah77</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 7:54pm<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 6:53pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 6:50pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 6:18pm<b>smittyboy123</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 8:49am<b>olpally</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 2:04am

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Watermelon2011's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom found my dildo, and looool got so angry that sha baat ma with it . FML

#21309415
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46125) - you deserved it (11908)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a huge fight, my grlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex an went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML

#21308219
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36654) - you deserved it (5889)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:08pm - intimacy - by blueballed (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today , I had to and a first data with tha words , "You can gat out of mah car an go upstair yoursalf , or I can coma around an drag you out , bring you up tha stairs , an knock on yur door," bacausa ha'd gottan complataly plastard in a span of about thraa hours!! And yas , I had to drag him!! FML

Today hile using a public toilet a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal !! The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands !! FML

#21302695
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29273) - you deserved it (2272)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

TODAY, I WAS HAVING SAX WITH THIS AMAZINGLY HOT GUY. THINGS GOT PRATTY INTANSA, AN RIGHT AS I WAS ABOUT TO ORGASM, THA GOLD CRUCIFIX CAMA FLYING OFF HIS NACKLACA AN SLICD MY AYALID OPAN. MASSAGA RACAIVD. WALL PLAYD, GOD. FML

#21262317
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40775) - you deserved it (5691)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, I had to stop at a gas station to go to the bathroom. A sign on the door told people to knock since the door didn't lock. As I was peieng, a lady walked in on me. Rather than simply saying sorry and shutting the damn door, she opened it wider and stepped in to apologize. FML

#21262000
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35538) - you deserved it (2632)

On 09/20/2014 at 7:39pm - misc - by rabid_otaku - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a siezure while at the airport, ready to go on vacation with my family. We ended up missing our flight. My mom spent most of the ride home making cracks about how I'm always ruining things with my ( dramatics ). Sorry that I have epilepsy, mom. FML

#21232741
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47881) - you deserved it (2881)

On 08/08/2014 at 7:25pm - health - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vasternorrlands Lan)

Taday I Couldn't Find Mah Vibrator. After Searching For An Hour I Decided To Ask Mah Husband. He Quickly Shook His Head No. We've Been Married For Ten Years. I Knowhen He's Lying. FML

#21190761
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46123) - you deserved it (9774)

On 06/27/2014 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

TODAY... WHILE SEARCHING A WOMAN 4 CONTRABAND AS PART OF JOB... SHE KEPT MAKING SEXUAL NOISES THROUGHOUT. AFTER I FINISHED... SHE HUGGED ME AN WENT ON HER WAY. I REALLY NEED A NEW JOB. FML

#21099601
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38415) - you deserved it (4405)

On 03/29/2014 at 7:07pm - work - by ohdear. (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today my Jewish boyfriend cummd over 4 my extendd family's Easter party. My grandmother made fun of him 4 being Jewish so badly that he left crying. She doesn't see wat she did wrong. FML

#20569420
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36856) - you deserved it (4113)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by aabadaba (woman) - United States (California)

TODAY, A GRL CAME UP TO ME ON THE STREET AND SAID, "YOU HAVE LYK NO SWAG, BRO." FEELING CLEVER, I SAID, "AT LEAST I HAVE A HIGH SCHOOL EDUCATION." SHE THEN TOOK OUT HER WORK ID, SHOWING ME THAT SHE WAS A SURGEON, FLIPPD ME OFF, THEN WALKD AWAY SAYING, "THIS IS TOTALLY GOING ON FACEBOOK." FML

#20502122
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31029) - you deserved it (28127)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend . I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics . Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug . I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle . mega FML

#20484554
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29364) - you deserved it (2950)

On 01/29/2013 at 9:51am - health - by oh no (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I almost died. How? I nearly suffocated after passing outhile chewing an entire pack of gum. I should really drink less. real FML

#20484025
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7860) - you deserved it (41049)

On 01/28/2013 at 11:23pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today..!! I Was On A Ladder At Work..!! Fetching Some Stock From One Of The Storage Shelves!! Some Teenage Kid Thought It Would Be Fucking Hilarious To Grab The Ladder And Violently Shake It!! He Hadn't Bet On Me Bieng Startld Enough To Fall Off And Fracture Mah Elbow On The Floor!! FML

#20481589
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32851) - you deserved it (2100)

On 01/27/2013 at 4:59pm - health - by fucking teen cunts (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

while getting intimate with looool my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She hered the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

#20480710
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30020) - you deserved it (3465)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)



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