About VentingToRandoms : Loyal as a well trained dog. Paintball and Video Games for life. League or SC2 Anyone?
VentingToRandoms's FML badges
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
VentingToRandoms's favorite FMLs
by needsnewshorts / 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was teaching my daughter how to drive. We were passing by a merge lane; I told her to slow down and let a green car merge in front of us. She said, "Fuck the green car" and sped up, colliding with it. Apparently she didn't know that would happen. FML
by Anonymous / 07/14/2013 at 11:40pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation
by nosestealer / 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by BlueB / 07/06/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
by The fuck, junior? / 07/05/2013 at 6:45pm / Canada (Quebec) / Kids
Today, I was at another long swim-meet, when my daughter shaved 15 seconds off her record swim time. When I asked her how she did it, she replied, "Well someone told me to swim as fast as I can." She's just been taking her time all these years. FML
by Anonymous / 07/02/2013 at 12:25pm / United States (Vermont) / Kids
by dry spell / 07/02/2013 at 12:17pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by SpiderFather / 07/02/2013 at 4:01am / France / Kids
Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 1:50am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Neveragain / 07/01/2013 at 1:49am / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML
by sorry, kiddo / 06/30/2013 at 5:44pm / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Kids
Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML
by blahblah / 06/26/2013 at 9:57pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 2:57am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML
by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
by kittybad / 06/23/2013 at 1:05am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, I truly understood that I was in Germany when, in my workplace, during our lunch break, one… Today, because I’m on my period, I asked my boyfriend to turn around so I could change my clothes.…