About ValVee92 : 💕✌🏼
ValVee92's FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
ValVee92's favorite FMLs
by sydneybourgeois / 08/13/2011 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, my boyfriend found out that if guys eat fruit often, their sperm will taste better. He bought a can of fruit for himself to eat, and said that he bought it just for me. This is the most romantic thing he's ever done. FML
by Pissedoff777 / 08/12/2011 at 1:33am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/08/2011 at 3:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, while watching tv at my mother's house, a tornado warning came across the screen. After being in the dark nasty basement for half an hour, my mom realizes she was watching a recorded show, and that tornado warning was for 2 weeks ago. FML
by cargaljen / 08/07/2011 at 1:29am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by soccerbuddyz / 08/03/2011 at 12:04am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Mary / 07/10/2011 at 8:49am / United States / Love
by mk / 06/14/2011 at 2:08am / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I discovered a tick on my penis. After a long battle, he finally let go. Four hours later I'm in the hospital. My penis is twice the normal size. I may have won the battle but lost the war. FML
by John jacob / 06/13/2011 at 2:25am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me. I was crying for over an hour in my room. My dad came in and asked what was wrong. Just as I was about to tell him, he stops me and simply says "Oh, honey. I don't care... Just keep the noise down." Then walks out. FML
by daddylove / 06/12/2011 at 12:21am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I saw my neighbor of twelve years at the grocery store. Being friendly, I went over to say hello. After I did, she responded by saying that she didn't know me but I look familiar. Finally, she remembered why I'm familiar saying that I look like the dorky guy from Two and a Half Men. FML
by Greig / 05/22/2011 at 8:18am / United States (Ohio) / Kids
by 1337fade / 04/07/2011 at 1:19am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy
by ewwww / 04/06/2011 at 3:31pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
- Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, my wife was talking to our 9 month-old baby. “Your father really is an example.” I smiled,… Today, I’m a bus driver in Paris. A guy got on with a sheep. I told him that you can’t take the bus…