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UnicornFarts

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UnicornFarts

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 24 March 1983 (32 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 831
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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UnicornFarts's page activity

Visits<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 1:44pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 6:33am<b>CelticKing</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 6:59am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 11:37pm<b>2potato4u</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 1:50am<b>rejlac</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 12:06pm<b>JOUSH94</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 10:14am<b>skittycat213</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 10:00pm<b>HeavenlyAura</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 5:51pm<b>jordyn20915</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 1:08am<b>ironfey</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:59pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 5:35pm<b>euphoriagorillaz</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 4:31pm<b>bluucat</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 12:36pm<b>oh_marie_me</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 12:07pm<b>zoe_nicoleee</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 12:01pm<b>mylifedeservesit</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 11:16am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 11:05am

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UnicornFarts's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my roommate with her ass cheeks spread wide, and her friend ripping a strip of wax off of her while wearing a headlamp flashlight to see if she "got it all". FML

#21420563
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30165) - you deserved it (3296)

On 06/04/2015 at 3:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

#21420039
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29416) - you deserved it (3952)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got sick of my flatmate stealing my food so I decided to sabotage a leftover pizza with laxatives. I came back home later in the evening after a night of heavy drinking. Guess what I had to eat in my drunken stupor. FML

#21409743
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15066) - you deserved it (32072)

On 05/13/2015 at 10:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my little sister filled the huge house I spent over a week building in Minecraft with TNT. She then demanded I give her all the money in my wallet, or she'd blow it all up. She's now $86.25 richer, and my parents think it's too hilarious to make her give me my money back. FML

#21399271
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25917) - you deserved it (22667)

On 04/24/2015 at 11:23pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, the last thing I remember before getting the shit beaten out of me at the bar, was my dipshit brother saying to me, "Dude, I'm not a racist, but" and then ranting about how non-whites should get out of America. FML

#21387285
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27449) - you deserved it (2765)

On 04/03/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my 5-year-old son how school went today. He sighed and said "Fuck off, dad." I thought kids only became such colossal douchebags in their teens. FML

#21387117
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29000) - you deserved it (5479)

On 04/03/2015 at 5:15pm - kids - by no, YOU raised him (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, some homeless person came up to the window and started doing a voice-over. FML

#21374736
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34141) - you deserved it (12505)

On 03/14/2015 at 11:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I took a nice relaxing dump at school, in my pants, in the middle of class. FML

#21350418
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32169) - you deserved it (7695)

On 02/05/2015 at 3:42pm - misc - by m33p - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to give me a naked massage. She straddled my back and started rubbing, then she sneezed and peed on me. FML

#21348755
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40536) - you deserved it (4191)

On 02/02/2015 at 11:36pm - love - by bootyislife - United States (Washington)

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30484) - you deserved it (4274)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

#21329462
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36890) - you deserved it (8224)

On 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by I'll Make You FartCum (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48353) - you deserved it (13579)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

#21299949
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35174) - you deserved it (3437)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)



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