About Umbreon01100 : I play Cello and Bass in Orchestra (been playing bass for 3 years, cello for 1 year.) I like basketball, swimming, and video games. I'm also Freshman at Box Elder. If you want to talk feel free to Kik me at umbreon01100
Umbreon01100's FML badges
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Umbreon01100's favorite FMLs
by mylifesucks / 01/31/2014 at 6:50pm / Intimacy
by jseid2 / 01/15/2014 at 12:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately, I ducked into the girl's bathroom. After few minutes, he stuck his head in with his eyes closed and asked if I was done yet. FML
by stalked / 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by fuckmuppeter512 / 01/04/2014 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by notsohandy / 01/03/2014 at 5:08pm / Denmark (Midtjylland) / Intimacy
by Lonesome / 01/01/2014 at 1:41am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy
Today, my husband called me from the store, trying to decide whether or not to buy the new games console he's been wanting. I'd already purchased one and hid it, ready for Christmas Day. I couldn't talk him into not buying himself one. There goes a $500 surprise. FML
by pissed / 12/17/2013 at 4:17pm / United States / Money
by Anonymous / 12/10/2013 at 4:06pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, my 13-year-old daughter excitedly told me about a new diet she read about online. Apparently, the diet entirely consists of bottled water and a mixture of food coloring. The food coloring "takes care of all that vitamin and mineral stuff." My daughter is an idiot. FML
by Nofoodcoloringisnotasubstituteforfood / 12/09/2013 at 12:52am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML
by Anonymous / 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by fuckadaisical / 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by OuchImAMoron / 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by :( / 11/17/2013 at 3:27pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I played a friendly prank on my dad, loosening the legs of his chair so it would fall apart when he sat on it. He responded by making me stand outside and watch as he keyed both sides of my car, front to back, as punishment. FML
by Anonymous / 11/03/2013 at 4:32pm / Cyprus (Nicosia) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…