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TylerBurden

Offline (the 01/22/2016 at 12:55pm) | Search for a member

TylerBurden

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 December 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2056
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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TylerBurden's page activity

Visits<b>amer9298</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 4:14am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 7:22pm<b>thatguy3812</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 2:13am<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 2:26pm<b>Grimmerie</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 4:26am<b>Starksrule</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 9:53am<b>PixelKat</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 5:49am<b>valxx92</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 2:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 8:20am<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:54am<b>One_Way</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 12:18am<b>Qindee</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 7:19am<b>Nubbington1402</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 6:15pm<b>gwyneth_jade</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:11am<b>Cherryheart</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 7:46am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 9:57am<b>tori3700</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 7:21pm<b>Florentina</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 5:03pm

Fucked!<b>thatguy3812</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 8:13am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:21pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 1:34pm

TylerBurden's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of TylerBurden's badges

TylerBurden's favorite FMLs

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

#21495080
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23355) - you deserved it (2153)

On 11/21/2015 at 5:03am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first job interview. The manager asks me to sell him his pen. Thinking I'm all smart, I reenact the scene from the Wolf of Wall Street and say, 'Write down your name'. He calmly reaches into his drawer, takes out another pen and writes his name down. He then looks at me and laughs. FML

#21287428
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34181) - you deserved it (8682)

On 10/29/2014 at 12:55am - work - by shadysheikh - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my band members and I were brainstorming ideas to help increase our fan base. My drummer suggested they replace me for someone attractive. Everyone agreed and now they are trying to kick me out of the band I started. FML

#20986659
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48572) - you deserved it (3647)

On 12/09/2013 at 6:25pm - misc - by YouAssholes - United States (California)

Today, my mother kept nagging at me because my 9-month-old daughter only calms down when I play her metal. She demands I use gospel, otherwise she will turn into a "devil-worshipping lunatic like her mother". FML

#20915864
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45754) - you deserved it (4970)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:04pm - kids - by SlapAndTickle - United States

Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML

#20684818
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48984) - you deserved it (8795)

On 05/25/2013 at 12:37am - kids - by Laurel (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML

#20640437
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47998) - you deserved it (11759)

On 05/04/2013 at 4:11am - health - by thatonesilentkidinclass (man) - Philippines (Batangas)

Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML

#20632729
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60704) - you deserved it (15942)

On 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by SecondBest,IGuess (woman) - United States

Today, I had to go to the emergency room with my sister, due to involuntary muscle spasms she was having. They gave her a muscle relaxer which caused her to be extremely tired and loopy. She decided to start singing loudly with a song she made up about butt fucking. FML

#20624720
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53124) - you deserved it (4992)

On 04/27/2013 at 8:42am - health - by seekerglow176 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

#20624343
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66766) - you deserved it (14997)

On 04/27/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

#20618481
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60510) - you deserved it (13790)

On 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm - misc - by Skyler - United States

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86081) - you deserved it (4529)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I went to my grandmom's house for an hour or so. When I came home, my boyfriend was on the bed, covered in the sheets and about to cry. Turns out he taped his ballsack to his leg and couldn't get it off because it "hurts too much." I'm 24 and he's 26. FML

#20616232
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39752) - you deserved it (5354)

On 04/23/2013 at 5:07pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while practicing a song in choir, I got a boner. Trying to cover it up, I tried sitting down. My choir teacher got mad and made me stand in front of the whole class. FML

#20615694
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74334) - you deserved it (9822)

On 04/23/2013 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by Soundofaboner - United States

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

#20613283
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50699) - you deserved it (3296)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:10pm - health - by shatMyself - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53214) - you deserved it (8477)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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