About Toughsky : The first picture is obviously a penguin. The second is a puzzle I finished. The third is a rainbow that appeared on my paper while I was reading.
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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Toughsky's favorite FMLs
by swee t / 09/21/2016 at 3:02pm / United States (North Carolina) / Money
Today, I've been recovering for a week from my medically needed circumcision. I'm 30, and they advise you wear essentially a jock strap for the first week to help. It wasn't too bad until I went to take the thing off and it caught a stitch on my manhood. That's the most unique pain ever. FML
by T3kM4n / 09/20/2016 at 2:08am / United States (Washington) / Health
by XRayXLopez1 / 09/19/2016 at 11:31pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend contacted me. She said she'd thought over her feelings over our temporary break in the relationship, and she wanted to try again. Being my stupid, self-loathing self, I asked her so many questions on if she was sure or not that she went back into doubt and revoked the offer. FML
by bruh_im18 / 09/17/2016 at 12:18pm / United States (Louisiana) / Love
Today, I called a cab to get me and my cat home from the vet. After a 40 minute wait and three calls to the taxi company, the operator told me that the driver she sent to my location just confirmed that he already has a woman with my name and a cat in his car. FML
by Rabite / 09/15/2016 at 10:48am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Transportation
Today, my dog brought me his squeaky toy to throw for him. I went to throw it down the hallway but it hit the door and bounced about a foot in front of him. He just stared at me for a minute like I was dumb, then took it to my boyfriend to throw. I disappoint even my dog. FML
by nattnatt73 / 09/10/2016 at 3:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
Today, my boyfriend sent me a picture of a bra he claimed I left at his house. I know every single bra I own, and it wasn't one of them, or so I thought. Only after I broke up with him did I remember I lost that bra two months ago. FML
by Anonymous / 09/08/2016 at 11:31am / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, I went to work early and saw my crush's car in the parking lot, so I parked next to her. After that, I looked over at her car to see her staring at me with a weird look and her saying, "Really?" Then she gestured around the lot; I looked around to find it completely empty. FML
by Asshole Parker / 09/06/2016 at 7:01am / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, I entered a raffle at a local fashion designer event; the prize was $400 credit at the store that was hosting it (which was just enough for one of their dresses). Good news: I won! Bad news: they don't carry a single thing above a women's size 5. I'm 6'2" and 180 lbs. FML
by Anonymous / 09/05/2016 at 9:32am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, my housemate and I had rough passionate sex in every room of the house. Being that I'm 18 and he's 32, it was a new thing for me. I just received a call from my mother stating that they would not be paying for the baby they watched us make through their wireless cams in our house. FML
by BabsZilla / 09/04/2016 at 8:21pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Xtrafresh / 08/30/2016 at 12:42pm / Netherlands / Animals
by shrek / 08/29/2016 at 6:26am / United States (Tennessee) / Love
Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually lose anything. Instead, my mom drunkenly admitted to tossing my stuff away and then punishing me for it whenever she was mad at me. FML
by WellPlayedMother / 08/24/2016 at 2:15am / Miscellaneous
Today, at work I did inventory with my boss. He did the top shelves and I did the bottom ones. By the end, my knees were dirty and sore. I went home and my roommate asked me how my day went. I absent-mindedly said, "My boss had me on my knees all day." He hasn't stopped laughing. FML
by inappropes / 08/18/2016 at 5:41pm / United States / Work
- Today, I play softball and we use eye black because it helps block out the glare. I sat down at my… Today, we were given an essay topic in English. The assignment involves us picking a politician by… Today, my live in boyfriend has been giving me the silent treatment for the last three days because…