Tiwuz

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Tiwuz

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2092
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Tiwuz : I have no life, so fuck it.

My life consists of writing something over and over for an hour, and then eventually not posting it.

Addicting to modding! Almost always on. I don't know if that's useful for you to know... probably not.

Tiwuz's page activity

Visits<b>Fiffy</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 4:25pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 5:52pm<b>ApexReaper</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 11:05am<b>SydneyGrey</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 8:39pm<b>megnog</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 12:41am<b>deathlumpzx3</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 3:56pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 4:48pm<b>NekoZombie</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 6:08am<b>PinkKawaiiChic</b> - the 12/20/2012 at 10:44am<b>kiwi2006</b> - the 10/22/2012 at 11:35am<b>Yunadori</b> - the 10/11/2012 at 8:08pm<b>outoftown</b> - the 09/29/2012 at 8:39pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 09/18/2012 at 11:52am<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 09/13/2012 at 4:34pm<b>trqskq</b> - the 08/29/2012 at 11:20am<b>Baustigt</b> - the 08/28/2012 at 11:21am<b>llamafish</b> - the 08/27/2012 at 1:49pm

Tiwuz's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

See all of Tiwuz's badges

Tiwuz's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me that he had once been possessed by demons, and that he now sleeps with a knife under his pillow for protection from, "The dark spirits that are feasting upon his soul." I'm not sure that I'll be sleeping over anytime soon. FML

by StillBetterThanTwilight / 08/28/2012 at 11:56am / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, I made the mistake of telling my dentist that my dog died. She spent the next half-hour talking about her pets and how they died. I ended up crying in her dentist's chair. FML

by anonya / 08/28/2012 at 12:43am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I bought a pack of toothpicks. There were 500 of them. When I got home I accidentally dropped the pack. After twenty long minutes of picking them up, I dropped them again. FML

by S. / 08/26/2012 at 12:20pm / Estonia / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

by ewww / 08/26/2012 at 5:21am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fainted during my sister's wedding because my dress was too tight. When I woke up, she slapped me hard across the face. Why? Because I "took all the attention away" from her. FML

by brylynn / 08/25/2012 at 9:58pm / United States / Health

Today, my swimming coach made us swim fifty laps non-stop as punishment for his previous class being unable to swim a drill properly. They're 8-11 year olds who are still learning to swim. I feel like my arms and legs are filled with lead. FML

by blue / 08/25/2012 at 5:59pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, I had to hunt down and collect a stray dog's feces for my parasitology class. FML

by missTyfied / 08/25/2012 at 3:11pm / Philippines (Rizal) / Animals

Today, while I was at work, my wife sent me a few pictures of her in a new lingerie, to "spice up" my day. She didn't realize that I have iCloud turned on so I can share files with my colleagues. My boss and a dozen other employees received the same pictures. FML

by Michael D. / 08/25/2012 at 12:06pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2012 at 11:48am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that just because the actual part of the pan that does touch the stove isn't hot doesn't mean that the handle won't give you third degree burns, a broken nose from passing out from the pain, and an expensive trip to the emergency room. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2012 at 9:15am / United States / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2012 at 8:47am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my crush didn't remember calling me beautiful, telling me he liked me, or any of the other romantic things he said to me while drunk last night. He did however remember me promising to bake him cookies. FML

Today, I was at a job interview. The interviewer spoke to me for a few minutes, then said she would be right back, and left. I was left alone in a room for an hour and a half believing that it was a patience test. They closed the store for the day, leaving me in the interview room. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2012 at 11:31pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, a thirty-something guy swaggered into my workplace. He was wearing shutter shades and torn jeans, and claimed to be our new boss. I called security to throw him out, at which point he produced his ID and let me know I'd be attending an employee review session next week. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2012 at 8:20pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Work

Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML

by ipayyourbillsgorramit / 08/24/2012 at 7:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous