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Tika876

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Tika876
  • Town/Country : Miami , U.S.A
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 April 1992 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 5500
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tika876 : Outgoing island girl and music lover. If you can make me laugh, we can be friends :D

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Tika876's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to a friend about how many germs live on the average cell phone. My five year old son apparently overheard me talking, and decided to give my cell phone a bath. FML

#19066123
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20207) - you deserved it (5058)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:23pm - kids - by Katherine - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML

#16201073
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27944) - you deserved it (7854)

On 05/16/2011 at 2:26am - misc - by bugnose (woman) -

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

#14277072
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41445) - you deserved it (3370)

On 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by morenita27 (woman) - Canada

Today, I found out my sister has a new boyfriend. That would have been helpful to know 3 hours ago before I told her boyfriend, who is also my best friend, that I loved him. His response? "HAHAHA! Good one! Oh Seriously? Shit." FML

#8765418
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28201) - you deserved it (2700)

On 03/02/2010 at 1:07am - love - by SingleSara. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML

#7379683
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28531) - you deserved it (2532)

On 01/16/2010 at 3:19pm - health - by dire-rear (woman) - Singapore

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

#7022853
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33127) - you deserved it (3118)

On 12/29/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by sickofsick - United States

Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42294) - you deserved it (2693)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

#5974378
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28876) - you deserved it (7981)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date night down a dirt road to a field in the middle of nowhere. He packed some blankets, a bottle of wine, and some condoms. He didn't know the dirt road was actually a driveway until all of our clothes were off. FML

Today, I had my first blow job. My girlfriend thought it would be sexy to "caress" my ball sack. By caress she meant bitch slap from side to side. FML

#4267516
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52860) - you deserved it (7093)

On 08/03/2009 at 10:37pm - intimacy - by BeboKhaos (man) - United States (California)

Today, while on a run, I thought I'd run into a flock of geese in a field. Doing so, I learned that when you do this alone, the birds don't fly away, they attack. FML

#3485353
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10577) - you deserved it (55996)

On 07/04/2009 at 5:56pm - animals - by SwordFish8 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I reached into my fridge to grab a strawberry soda. I noticed the can had started to leak from the top so I slurped up the spilt red liquid on the top of the can. I realized it wasn't soda, but blood from a defrosting steak on the shelf above it. FML

#2929872
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47282) - you deserved it (20155)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by kjmsit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on the phone with a prospective blind date. He asked me to describe myself so I said that I was fun, attractive and a little chubby but not fat. My 7 year old sister walked up to me and screamed "Jesus doesn't like it when we lie!". FML

#2914098
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46006) - you deserved it (13147)

On 06/15/2009 at 3:11pm - love - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

#1714855
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25104) - you deserved it (92287)

On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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