TheJapaneseSushi

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Offline (the 12/28/2015 at 8:40pm)

TheJapaneseSushi

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Boulder, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 November 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 841
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About TheJapaneseSushi : CU Boulder

TheJapaneseSushi's page activity

Visits<b>stingray112</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 9:10pm<b>pmillerpoms</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 11:54pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 1:15pm<b>emlizcat</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 12:30am<b>westin0530</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 1:27am<b>han1717</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 8:26pm<b>sa5v</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 1:58pm<b>Quendolin</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 9:07am<b>rmagee2000</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 10:27pm<b>chefmadizion</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 4:46am<b>JayDay_123</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:26am<b>BrookieAnn</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 2:00am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 9:08pm<b>HannahBanana04</b> - the 03/20/2013 at 9:37pm<b>Lakers78</b> - the 03/20/2013 at 3:29pm<b>Takashiro</b> - the 03/06/2011 at 3:11am

TheJapaneseSushi's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of TheJapaneseSushi's badges

TheJapaneseSushi's favorite FMLs

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

by chumman / 05/06/2014 at 9:55am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, marks my fifth day being an English teacher's assistant. I spent it like the other four days: grading and editing terrible Teen Wolf, One Direction and Doctor Who high school fan-fiction. Six months until I get out of here. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2013 at 2:38am / United States (California) / Work

Today, marks my fifth day being an English teacher's assistant. I spent it like the other four days: grading and editing terrible Teen Wolf, One Direction and Doctor Who high school fan-fiction. Six months until I get out of here. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2013 at 2:38am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I found out that my roommate secretly edited a paper I wrote and recently turned in, so that it repeatedly refers to the famed author "Kneel Gayman." I'm positive that's not how it's spelled. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2013 at 3:30pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my elderly neighbour was having some kind of house party. It was incredibly loud, so I went and asked if he could tone it down a little. He responded by grabbing a deck chair, smacking me with it, then chasing me back to my house, all while his guests cheered him on. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2013 at 4:19pm / Switzerland / Miscellaneous

Today, my cousin texted me, asking how the chicken pizza had settled in my stomach. We got drunk last night and had pizza. I thought it was cheese; it was chicken. I've been vegetarian for 7 years. FML

by Aly / 08/15/2013 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing / 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

by JuggaloSlasher15 / 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I went to my father for advice. I've been seeing a wonderful girl for the past month, and I feel terrible about it, because I already have a girlfriend. He said "Kill yourself" and that if I "can't even do that right" then to get out of his house, because he disowns me. FML

by i suck, this i know :( / 07/26/2013 at 6:11pm / Malawi (Blantyre) / Love

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2013 at 11:45am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, I was doing a demonstration in front of my taekwondo class because I'm flexible. Really flexible. I kneed myself in the face and broke my nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2013 at 12:37am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

by rawdoglyfe69 / 04/17/2013 at 2:14am / United States (Montana) / Love

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 1:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I sent a dozen roses and a hand-written, heart-felt note to my ex-girlfriend to show her that I'm still madly in love with her. When I asked if she got the flowers I sent, she replied, "Yeah but you got the wrong color. You should've gotten yellow, that stands for friendship." FML

by Roses are Red / 03/07/2013 at 1:07am / United States (Mississippi) / Love