TheCitizens96

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TheCitizens96

147Fucked!

TheCitizens96TheCitizens96
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 March 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5540
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About TheCitizens96 : Me? I'd say I am pretty chill and easy-going, but I also appreciate people who use correct spelling/grammar. :) I'm a world traveling trilingual college student studying to be an Accountant. 👌

I'm a foodie... and that's why I also love working out. I am happiest outdoors doing things like fishing, hiking, kayaking, and canoeing! I love a good adventure. ⛰ I also greatly enjoy watching Sylvester Stallone films.

I do have an Instagram, and I probably won't bite... So, don't be afraid to ask.

TheCitizens96's page activity

Visits<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 9:54pm<b>patwo8</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 6:18pm<b>shyy_girl</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 12:46pm<b>xXSunshineXx1</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 8:50pm<b>bigbrown24</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 2:21am<b>boultzboi</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 6:04pm<b>jackroarrr</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 12:14pm<b>sunyaph</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 11:31am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 7:52am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 6:27pm<b>neel1978</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:36pm<b>scottyboy417</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 2:38am<b>Mae342</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:27am<b>Mons</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 7:09am<b>PercyD1456</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 6:43am<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 3:32am<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 9:14pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 4:23pm

Fucked!<b>patwo8</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 10:30am<b>boultzboi</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 12:05am<b>Mae342</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 6:28am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:37am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 3:27am<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 3:23pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 1:33am<b>Tori_belle</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 3:35am<b>george_s_4</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 12:47pm<b>grifmelo</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 10:35pm<b>Wane8822</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 5:59pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 7:32pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:51am<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 1:55pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 9:22pm<b>NateC27</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 7:34pm<b>jesusalejndr</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 4:25pm<b>bps315</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 12:20am

TheCitizens96's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of TheCitizens96's badges

TheCitizens96's favorite FMLs

Today, I joined my grandpa on his morning jog. I didn't last 15 minutes before nearly passing out from exhaustion. He came jogging back home nearly an hour later looking even better than he did when we left. FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2016 at 12:41pm / United States / Health

Today, a stranger had a go at me for smoking while pregnant. I'm a guy. FML

by nerp / 03/29/2016 at 3:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a long, relaxing, hot bath with my girlfriend after a long day. She had fallen asleep in my arms and everything was perfect - until I noticed the water around us had started turning yellow as she pissed herself in her sleep. FML

by itsbeenalongday / 09/27/2015 at 12:05pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was changing my clothes with my dog in the room. As I took off my shirt, he looked at me, ran into the corner, and threw up. Well that's a confidence booster. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2015 at 2:55pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, an old lady wearing a low-cut shirt with no bra underneath came into my line with some groceries. At some point while bagging her groceries, her wrinkled breast slipped out of her shirt. She didn't even notice. I wish to fuck I could unsee this. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2015 at 2:15am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" / 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, the man who stole my laptop at the train station yesterday used the contact information I had written on it to call me and ask for the password. FML

by what / 06/11/2015 at 6:46pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, a customer yelled, "I'll bash your fuckin' face in, cunt" at me at 9:30am because we don't serve the lunch menu at breakfast time. Yes, the 15-year-old girl in high school is responsible for McDonald's entire menu. FML

by McFuckYouTooCunt / 06/11/2015 at 9:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I walked outside to get the paper, and saw a dying bird I assumed had flown into the window. It was warm so I thought it might still be alive. I wasn't wearing my glasses though, and was trying to nurse a dog turd back to life. FML

by nerderer / 06/04/2015 at 10:17pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2015 at 1:58am / Finland / Work

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids

Today, as I passed by the window that looks out on to my front yard, I saw a man out there so I ran to the kitchen to call the police. The operator asked me to describe the man. It was then that I realized the mysterious man in my yard was the snowman I built yesterday. FML

by anon / 02/03/2015 at 2:50am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my mum sat me down for a serious talk about not being home enough - not because she misses me, but because the family cat needs more stability in her life. FML

by cat co-parent / 01/02/2015 at 7:11pm / Australia / Animals

Today, it's my 40th birthday. I got two presents by mail: a jar of wrinkle cream from a market research company, and an ad from a funeral home. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2015 at 5:46pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous