Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheAbstract

Search for a member

TheAbstract

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 February 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1696
  • Number of comments : 233
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About TheAbstract : Just another FML-er here to enjoy the misery of others. :D

TheAbstract's page activity

Visits<b>ImaginaryPerson</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:28am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 1:32am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:24pm<b>Retaheki</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 3:27pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 8:17am<b>___Abbey___</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 5:15pm<b>JellyJace</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 3:10pm<b>xxrogerthatxx</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 12:46am<b>noahshane</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 5:58pm<b>EdenCrystal</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:23pm<b>tgold49</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:26pm<b>TastyRissoll</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:26pm<b>christian1509</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:24pm<b>Khorlik</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:18pm<b>Jameson5011</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:17pm<b>Horrible_Jack</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:08pm<b>guelito97</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:08pm<b>cwenboo</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:08pm

Fucked!<b>dcisecurite</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 6:37am

TheAbstract's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of TheAbstract's badges

TheAbstract's favorite FMLs

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML

#21034458
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28097) - you deserved it (43287)

On 01/20/2014 at 10:34pm - kids - by Ginger_Gawd - United States (Florida)

Today, concerned about my daughter's recent behavior, I looked through her web browser history. I found web searches for information on how to make a bomb to blow up a "horse". I'm not sure if she's illiterate, but either way it seems I need to get her some help. FML

#20977212
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41692) - you deserved it (4066)

On 12/01/2013 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I reduced my psychologist to tears. FML

#20976567
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44515) - you deserved it (4168)

On 12/01/2013 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33493) - you deserved it (15692)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend announced to me he was sleeping with another girl via alphabet soup. FML

#20968871
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45272) - you deserved it (3515)

On 11/24/2013 at 11:01am - love - by fries - United States (New York)

Today, I had to have a talk with my stalker. After telling him not to snapchat me, not to text me, and that I'm not interested, all he said was "I think persistence is going to be key here." FML

#20967638
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44416) - you deserved it (3551)

On 11/23/2013 at 3:02am - misc - by AshleyRose24 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53710) - you deserved it (5600)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, I heard my surgeon mutter to a nurse how easy it would be to kill me on the operating table and make it look like an accident. FML

#20940427
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49851) - you deserved it (3336)

On 10/31/2013 at 4:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, my 19-year-old, long-distance boyfriend told me he wouldn't be able to text me all day because it's too hard to type while in his Spider-Man suit. It's non-negotiable. FML

#20940116
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37977) - you deserved it (14613)

On 10/31/2013 at 10:30am - love - by AML (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our bathroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in the day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out that pipe wasn't the only one he snaked. FML

#20932505
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58282) - you deserved it (3893)

On 10/24/2013 at 4:06pm - misc - by soon to be divorced (man) - United States

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28693) - you deserved it (41199)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper. I had to reach into my small trash can and use soiled toilet paper to clean myself. When I went to flush the toilet, I noticed three unused rolls of toilet paper sitting on the counter. FML

Today, after months of exercise and diets and finally reaching my ideal weight, I told my morbidly obese cousin about my success, hoping to motivate him to do the same. He replied, "Why would it matter, you're still ugly." FML

#20921493
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48657) - you deserved it (5490)

On 10/15/2013 at 1:08pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML

#20920034
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51162) - you deserved it (5826)

On 10/14/2013 at 12:02pm - love - by lovehurts - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: