Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Tezoma

Online | Search for a member

Tezoma

12Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 20 March 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7282
  • Number of comments : 124
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tezoma : I am an nineteen year old responsible adult. I enjoy standing front row at concerts, moshing, video games, anime, British TV, Korean romantic comedies (my guilty pleasure), homestuck, MLP, WTNV, The Monstrumologist, and, occasionally, the slots.
I'm a lover of poetry and art and I am a pro doodler.

I do and say childish things sometimes, and I am very sorry for that. But I am a child. I have no self control, and there seems to be no helping it.

Messages are nice.

Tezoma's page activity

Visits<b>momac86</b> - yesterday at 3:20am<b>redrain567</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 3:01pm<b>mutiplyyou</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 10:16am<b>Gillett</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 11:33am<b>ShatteredPulse</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 9:18am<b>chrisstachon</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 5:13am<b>geon_olam</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 10:34am<b>FleibenHolden</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 12:46pm<b>tweetyzyaw</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 8:30am<b>kikoma</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 5:04pm<b>BountyBass</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 9:01pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 1:26am<b>ArellaRoth</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 1:40pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 3:30am<b>TheGolfGTI</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 5:06pm<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 3:42pm<b>anothemy</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 11:56pm

Fucked!<b>geon_olam</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 4:34pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 6:27am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 8:43pm<b>Zacky_Chan</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 3:10pm<b>Morticia_Addams</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 4:22am<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 3:45am<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 7:33am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 1:30pm<b>Acerhawk</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 7:01pm<b>eaglerob</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:35pm<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 6:24pm

Tezoma's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Tezoma's badges

Tezoma's favorite FMLs

Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML

#21396226
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23139) - you deserved it (2324)

On 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm - animals - by woof? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my grandma told me point-blank that she despises gays, but that she'll go to my wedding for the booze and nothing more. FML

#21396211
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24092) - you deserved it (3391)

On 04/19/2015 at 12:34pm - love - by leonuniz (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was so sleep-deprived, I thought a white car driving toward me was a polar bear. I screamed like a little girl and started panicking. I live in California. FML

#21396178
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20920) - you deserved it (5488)

On 04/19/2015 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend let out a horrible fart in the middle of sex. Even though it was clearly his, he gave me disgusted look, called me a dirty bitch, then kept going. Let's just say I didn't finish. FML

#21396154
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23436) - you deserved it (2139)

On 04/19/2015 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I found out that the only reason my parents have been letting me hang out with my friends so late is so they can search my room for drugs. FML

#21395867
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24081) - you deserved it (2544)

On 04/18/2015 at 7:55pm - misc - by Armstrong (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a date with a girl I like. Afterwards, I drove her home, and we just sat there awkwardly. I thought she wanted to kiss me but was nervous, so I jokingly said "What're you waiting for? Christmas?" I guess she took that as a "Get the hell out", because she broke into tears and left. FML

#21395685
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19118) - you deserved it (24829)

On 04/18/2015 at 10:38am - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got into an argument with my racist brother after he opened his god damn stupid mouth in front of my girlfriend. He actually tried to convince me that he's not a racist, because one of his favorite types of porn is black girls getting fucked by white guys. FML

#21395531
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25248) - you deserved it (2225)

On 04/18/2015 at 12:57am - misc - by assault and imnotracistbuttery (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to have a cervical biopsy. The doctor said I would feel slight cramping as she scraped cells from inside the cervix. I guess by "slight cramping" she meant I would shit, throw up, and then pass out. FML

#21395495
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26721) - you deserved it (1782)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:15pm - health - by khaoslife - United States (Kentucky)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, I got banned from my favourite online video game for calling a person on my team a "Baked Potato". FML

Today, my husband came too soon during sex. He then tried to pretend it didn't happen and continued. He humped me with a half-erect noodle for about seven minutes before I finally called him out. FML

#21394468
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28729) - you deserved it (4631)

On 04/16/2015 at 1:04am - intimacy - by Evra (woman) - United States

Today, I went to feed my neighbors' chickens while they were on vacation. I noticed the TV on inside, so I peeked in to see if the place was being messed with. Guess who found the neighbor home early, fully naked, and jerking off. FML

#21393386
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28320) - you deserved it (3028)

On 04/14/2015 at 4:33am - intimacy - by Lebac - United States (Washington)

Today, I thought my dad was finally showing interest in the business I started last year when he asked about my next event. Nope, he just wanted to know if I would hire his step-granddaughter. Her first question: "So, I won't have to do any like, real work right?" Gee, thanks Dad. FML

#21393221
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25172) - you deserved it (1874)

On 04/13/2015 at 9:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is not a screamer nor a moaner, she's a biter. My arm is getting stitches right now. FML

#21393183
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26562) - you deserved it (2756)

On 04/13/2015 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, I got grounded because my mom found a condom in the bathroom trashcan and assumed it was mine. I took the blame because I was too embarrassed to admit that it must have belonged to my 13-year-old brother, since I'm still a virgin at 19. FML

#21391452
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29515) - you deserved it (4623)

On 04/10/2015 at 7:16pm - misc - by uglybrother (man) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: