TaylorTotsYumm

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TaylorTotsYumm

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16284
  • Number of comments : 1133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About TaylorTotsYumm : Things I love:
•Seattle
•soccer
•popsicles
•indie rock, classic rock, grunge, alt., jazz, blues
•Amy Winehouse
•Harry Potter
•oceans
•Febreze
•Anne Hathaway
•Liverpool fc
•'90s cartoons
•All That
•singing
•Grey's Anatomy
•environmental consciousness
•dykes

Things I hate:
•Man. U
•autotune
•wbc

-If you have any questions for me, or just want to talk, shoot me a message. I'll answer next time I use the website rather than the app.

TaylorTotsYumm's page activity

Visits<b>Arnv</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 11:35pm<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 1:48pm<b>Parkourlife20</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 4:08am<b>TheGoatTamer</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 4:39pm<b>BonerFart</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 2:35pm<b>Jonjon554</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 11:20am<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 9:02am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 2:30am<b>sierraskye</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 8:26am<b>Rgduncan</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 11:03pm<b>weedle99</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 3:40pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 5:33pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 10:38pm<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 4:13pm<b>dlashayj2</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 3:04pm<b>madi10647</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 9:34pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 10:38am<b>shanewh40</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 10:23pm

Fucked!<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 8:30am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 11:34pm<b>dariusdeath</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 4:59am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 10:33pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 12:34pm<b>NoName011</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 1:16am<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 12:09am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 3:37am

TaylorTotsYumm's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of TaylorTotsYumm's badges

TaylorTotsYumm's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML

by Jordid / 08/19/2010 at 12:12am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML

by kiki / 08/05/2010 at 2:24pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I was called handsome. Too bad it was coming from a trashed homeless lady, who then went on to tell me that she likes my lips and wants to rape me. FML

by IllJustGetYouASweaterThen / 08/04/2010 at 3:58am / United States (New Mexico) / Intimacy

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. How? I went to a party with some friends and they each bet me $20 I couldn't lick my elbow. I guess I proved them wrong. FML

by one_BAMF / 07/25/2010 at 1:06am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

by Wawawiwa / 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm / Namibia (Windhoek) / Intimacy

Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I tell him I just got my period, he impatiently says "Is it over yet?" FML

by MandMandM / 07/19/2010 at 2:38am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

by reckless / 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend wouldn't lick the whipped cream I had on my nipples because "That stuff is full of calories." FML

by Rowden / 04/26/2010 at 5:58am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

by junior / 04/11/2010 at 4:11am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

by syl / 02/11/2010 at 1:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

by scubai / 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML

by Michelle / 12/27/2009 at 2:13am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend. Things got a little hot and I started to pull up my shirt. She screamed and told me to stop because the innocence of her stuffed animals was at stake. We are 18, and she was dead serious. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2009 at 2:09am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML

by paidback / 12/24/2009 at 8:10pm / United States / Intimacy