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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 November 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1023
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 9 posted

About Tattooed_Blonde : My name is Megan-Jade
And I would be a better serial killer than you.
I swear, I get inked and I drink.
I party and get so wasted that I can't see straight.
I wish I was five again, so I would
have a better reason to get barbie naked.
I don't care about how wonderful you are.
Music is my fuck drug.
Grow a brain and say more than just "sup."
I laugh loud and hard... It's pretty fucking annoying.
I love nature and the nature of people,
you never cease to amaze me.

Tattooed_Blonde's page activity

Visits<b>justdoingmybest</b> - the 12/03/2016 at 8:36pm<b>boogatsbh</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 8:15am<b>viaaaaaa</b> - the 11/12/2016 at 9:03pm<b>1DisGR8</b> - the 11/12/2016 at 12:07pm<b>DrafteeSelf</b> - the 11/09/2016 at 12:44pm<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 10/29/2016 at 5:43pm<b>Sia_Will</b> - the 10/27/2016 at 1:15am<b>RCSLASH</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 2:29pm<b>eggnog5000</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 2:17pm<b>stalking_wolf274</b> - the 10/02/2016 at 4:59pm<b>idiotstar123</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 12:07pm<b>CaptMacLeod</b> - the 09/29/2016 at 9:04pm<b>DamnDoor</b> - the 09/22/2016 at 4:42pm<b>jengo54</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 9:24pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 09/10/2016 at 1:10am<b>CamBamShamDaMan</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 9:53am<b>eat_pork</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 1:11am<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 2:38pm

Fucked!<b>DrafteeSelf</b> - the 11/09/2016 at 6:45pm<b>RCSLASH</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 8:29pm<b>idiotstar123</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 6:08pm<b>CaptMacLeod</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 3:28am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 7:22pm<b>_Humble_Power</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 8:51pm<b>Wolverine48Ga</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 2:26pm<b>sammie2new</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 5:39am<b>dno79</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 3:01pm<b>rookiebenuel</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 2:05pm<b>Druu</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 7:24am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 12:29am<b>patte</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 6:45am<b>bunnyboo7799</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 12:17am<b>jayemerald17</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 9:54pm<b>sarahmsw20</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:17pm<b>MissMayLaw001</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:03pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:11pm

Tattooed_Blonde's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Tattooed_Blonde's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2010 at 3:32pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was about to take a crap when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML

by justme / 02/09/2010 at 1:20pm / Kids

Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided to catch it to get a close look. After I picked it up, I realized that it was not a frog. It was dog shit shaped like a frog. FML

by adad / 02/01/2010 at 9:34am / Animals

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

by doesnttastegood / 02/01/2010 at 5:23am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad came out of a hotel bathroom with nothing but a wash-cloth over his crotch and said "look! this place has cotton loin clothes" in front of my wedding party. FML

by indianaxx / 01/30/2010 at 12:21pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking to school. When I was about halfway there, someone put a gun to the back of my head and told me to give him all my money. As I slowly turned around, I saw it was my dad putting a banana to my head. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2010 at 8:16am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I went to my doctor to get my x-ray results. Turns out, I have a fractured spine and a chip of my spine has moved. Now I'm in a neck brace because my dad didn't think it was serious, and told me to "suck it up princess." FML

by RAHrahRAH / 01/14/2010 at 9:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I realized why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML

by Amber / 01/10/2010 at 12:17pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

by Soresack / 01/04/2010 at 8:34am / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML

by thornrose22 / 10/31/2009 at 8:22pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at work lifeguarding and saw a kid drowning on the far end of the pool. I decided running would be the quickest way to get to her, but as I ran across the pool deck I slipped and hit my head. The kid's mother jumped in to save her child and then called an ambulance for me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2009 at 10:23pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love