Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About SydneyGrey : Hi! I love this blog and find it hilarious! My friend introduced it to me after I got mad at him for laughing at other people's misery. Hahaha. Well I'm laughing now too! So other than i LOVE acting, singing, dancing, and just overall performing!!! I LOVE cross country! my life is literally theatre, xc, school, and thats it!!! (u might think its sad but i enjoy every minute of it!) Im VERY protective of my loved ones and will beat someone up if they mess w/ them! :) I am 100% anti-bully for personal reasons (don't ask, i wont tell) Oh and I love disney and food and being me! I'm a sophomore! And I'm single! :) never had a bf/been kissed. yeah that's it BYE! just FYI I'm a total 100% dorky nerd!!!! Haha I just don't look like one though (I hope ;) )
Also I don't have a kik, fb, etc.. U can message me through FML though! I don't bite but don't even bother asking for pics! I will NOT send any!!!! I will tell u to F off instead!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML
Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML
Today, I received a text from my dad, which was borderline-incomprehensible due to an insane amount of text language. I replied, jokingly asked if he had a stroke while writing it. A few seconds after hitting send, I remembered the stroke he suffered last month. FML
Today, my 15-year-old daughter's pregnancy test came back positive. I wanted to know who the father is, so I could sit the two of them down to talk the situation through with them. She isn't sure if it's her best friend, or our neighbor's son. FML
Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML
Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML
Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of over a year has been cheating on me the whole time, but that "it's just physical". However, he doesn't want to do anything "physical" with me, except cuddle when we're together. FML
Thursday 10 April 2014