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SunnySunnshine's favorite FMLs
Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML
by cjw / 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm / United States / Kids
Today, while lying in bed, I heard a strange grating noise coming from the hallway. After recovering from my initial assumption that it was a poltergeist come to murder me and steal my liver, I went out to investigate. It was there that I discovered my bulldog casually eating into the wall. FML
by Baustigt / 04/10/2012 at 6:48am / Australia (Western Australia) / Animals
by bellaskyeb / 01/08/2012 at 12:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML
by vanessa560 / 01/03/2012 at 2:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by GingerJ / 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm / United Kingdom (London) / Health
Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML
by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm / United States / Love
by aninnocentonlooker / 12/04/2011 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by notsohappilyeverafter / 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (California) / Love
by Dickhead / 11/25/2011 at 10:02am / Lebanon / Intimacy
by Faithful / 11/24/2011 at 5:01am / Singapore / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/08/2011 at 11:11pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/16/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Texas) / Love
by katt_is_here / 10/02/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Colorado) / Work
by anonymous / 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
- Today, I went to bed with three hot, half-naked girls beneath me. I was in the bunk above. Alone.… Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first… Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited,…
- Today, my bike brakes failed as I was going downhill. I ended up running a light and hit a car at… Today my fiancee and I were having sex, it was lovely and we both were really into it. I decided to… Today, While at a resort, my friends and I decided to go to the indoor pool. I was surprised when I…