About Sunkistlover718 : I lurk in the shadows, only uttering comments when I feel especially compelled to.
Sunkistlover718's FML badges
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
You sure know how to party?
You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!
Sunkistlover718's favorite FMLs
by ohfuckwaffles / 01/29/2013 at 12:28am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by hopelessteej / 01/28/2013 at 8:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML
by GiraffeLover / 01/11/2013 at 6:36am / Australia / Love
Today, I told my girlfriend that my identical twin and I are not in fact related, that he's adopted, and that the only reason we look exactly the same is because we eat and drink the same things. She actually believed it. FML
by datingablonde / 01/11/2013 at 12:20am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML
by Grant / 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm / United States / Kids
by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/06/2013 at 8:06am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I bought an eye mask to help me sleep during the day, as I work night shifts. Upon waking up after my first time using it, I forgot I was wearing it and thought I had gone blind, causing me to fall out of the bed and split my head open on my bedside table. FML
by idiot / 01/04/2013 at 5:13am / Sweden / Health
Today, after I finally laid down from a long day and was about to fall asleep, I realized I forgot to set my alarm. I don't own an alarm clock and my alarm is on my phone. Which was in my car. I live on 15th floor of an apartment building and our parking garage is across the street. FML
by Anonymous / 01/03/2013 at 12:02am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML
by catdog / 01/02/2013 at 1:07am / United States (California) / Animals
by _The__Doctor_ / 12/31/2012 at 5:44pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, my boss put me on suspension, a week after granting a subordinate time off to recover from surgery. When I signed the paperwork, I was too embarrassed to admit I didn't understand her writing, which apparently said she was getting treated for "dangerously low levels of dick". FML
by offtothejobcentre / 12/31/2012 at 5:42pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
by ugh / 12/26/2012 at 9:05am / United States (Ohio) / Health
Today, I received my soccer team jacket that I ordered a month ago. Trying to save money, I'd selected the "no name" option to avoid an extra $20 embroidering fee. My jacket now has "NO NAME" spelled out on the side of it, and I was charged the extra $20 dollars after all. FML
by Anonymous / 12/23/2012 at 12:01am / Canada / Money
Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML
by anonymaiacciu / 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm / France / Intimacy
- Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people.… Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door… Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited…