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SteffiTheSmile

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SteffiTheSmile
  • Town/Country : Igloo
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 25 December 1940 (73 years)
  • Number of visits : 814
  • Number of comments : 470
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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SteffiTheSmile's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner, but couldn't eat because he had just gotten his tongue pierced. My grandpa heard this, winked at my boyfriend and said "Can't eat now, but I bet that's all you'll be doing in a few weeks..." My super protective father was sitting right next to him. FML

#572670
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76027) - you deserved it (8501)

On 03/24/2009 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one smallest penis I have ever seen." FML

#273753
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65898) - you deserved it (8304)

On 03/11/2009 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML

#121139
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64503) - you deserved it (16984)

On 02/24/2009 at 2:31am - intimacy - by addictedtofml (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was masturbating on my inflatable air mattress that squeaks when you move. Suddenly, my mom busted in my room to ask if I'm okay because she thought the squeaking was my crying. I ripped my hands from my pants and turned on my side; she walked over and grabbed my hands to console me. FML

#70419
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22355) - you deserved it (54287)

On 02/18/2009 at 6:01pm - intimacy - by dirtyhands (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, two girls invited me up to their room at 3 am. As soon as we pressed the up button on the elevator, the fire alarm went off. FML

#6093
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56535) - you deserved it (4548)

On 02/03/2009 at 9:25am - intimacy - by SoClose (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML

#4489
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60240) - you deserved it (5124)

On 02/01/2009 at 5:53am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my nephew asked me how babies are made. I thought he'd had this chat with his mom, but I went in to it again. After a 20 minute 'discussion', he says "So what about the good stuff - get to the blowjobs and the lesbians." He's 11. FML

#3221
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23288) - you deserved it (2361)

On 01/28/2009 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by epistaxis - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I sprayed hair spray under my arms instead of anti-perspirant. I didn't realize it until I went to put my shirt on and couldn't raise my arms. FML

#2075
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14765) - you deserved it (9031)

On 01/21/2009 at 3:06pm - love - by stanDman - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was teaching a class but kids were chatting. After 3 soap box speeches about "The next person who talks gets a note to take home," one kid looked right at me and went "meow". FML

#891
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15084) - you deserved it (4786)

On 01/09/2009 at 3:54am - kids - by Liz - Sent from mobile version



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