Starzak

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Starzak

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : South Gate, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12650
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Starzak : Contrary to popular belief, you're and your are NOT interchangeable for fuck's sake.

Starzak's page activity

Visits<b>SOILEDIT</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 11:12pm<b>Candygrl987</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 1:12pm<b>mrsmikelowrey</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 3:41pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 7:41am<b>royr7395</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 8:56pm<b>Mons</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 6:47am<b>nfern046</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 11:26pm<b>KayDee29</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 3:27pm<b>splitms</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 7:04pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 4:20am<b>boostedc</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 5:58am<b>smeegle</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 6:53pm<b>914smv</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 6:11pm<b>moldypickles</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 12:49pm<b>SorryWrongPerson</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 11:39am<b>jentrynicole</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 10:27am<b>Lustig_Junge</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 10:23am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 9:23am

Fucked!<b>splitms</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 3:06am<b>Rebecca_917</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 8:48pm

Starzak's FML badges

Perfectionist

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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Starzak's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister played a prank by pretending to break into my house. I ended up nailing her in the chest with my baseball bat. Now all of my family is bitching and wants me to pay the medical bills. FML

by BlueBaronBitch / 06/24/2016 at 10:59am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while vacationing with my boyfriend of 9 years, he started writing "Wi" in the sand. I instantly hoped he was going to propose by writing, "Will you marry me" on the beach. He spelled out "wiener" instead. FML

by ForeverAGirlfriend / 06/13/2016 at 12:40am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, my boyfriend proposed. I was about to call my parents and tell them we're getting married, but they called me first to announce they're getting a divorce. FML

by Toloveornottolove / 06/12/2016 at 12:08pm / Canada / Love

Today, I was grabbed and romantically kissed at the crowded carnival. Unfortunately, it was not by my husband but instead it was a complete stranger, in front of my husband and children. Now, my husband will not talk or believe that I didn't know the man, and my children think I'm a cheater. FML

by babyscarface / 06/12/2016 at 11:48am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was eating breakfast when my little brother goes, "Mommy, what do you do for a living?" and my mom says "I'm a headmaster", and my dad goes, "Oh yeah she is." FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2016 at 10:09pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream that I was swinging through New York City as my favorite hero, Spider-Man. I was almost immediately beaten to death by a mugger. I suck even in my dreams. FML

by Spider fail / 05/31/2016 at 3:06pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a mini heart attack as my dad stopped in the middle of the street and said, "I wonder what'd happen if I just dropped my pants right now and started jerking it in front of all these motherfuckers." FML

by dad, please / 05/16/2016 at 1:37am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, while shopping, I told my wife I'd love some pork chops for dinner. Someone nearby muttered, "That's practically cannibalism, ya fat pig." My wife immediately had a "coughing attack" that sounded suspiciously like it was covering up laughter. FML

by dempasi / 05/06/2016 at 2:51pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got mugged. Trying to be brave, I attacked my mugger, who then broke my nose. Suddenly, I was saved by someone: A 15 year-old goth girl who promptly tackled the mugger to the ground. I'm a 21 year old man. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2016 at 1:32pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a train, a little boy and girl come up to me and ask how babies are made. Already pretty uncomfortable with their question, their mother suddenly appears and says, "Go on, tell them!" FML

by Anthony / 04/14/2016 at 7:15pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I had to spend a long bus ride with my chest pressed against the window, because some mammoth of a woman decided to squeeze her double wide ass into my seat. FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2016 at 1:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my boyfriend of 2 years on a family vacation to meet my family for the first time. We all got really drunk and he made out with my dad. This was day one and we don't fly back for another 16 days. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2016 at 1:48pm / United States (Oregon) / Holidays

Today, a stranger had a go at me for smoking while pregnant. I'm a guy. FML

by nerp / 03/29/2016 at 3:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working for a hospital security company, I had to assist in restraining a male patient while the nurses put a catheter in him. All I will say is that it looked like a worm trying to swallow a straw. FML

by Shock / 03/21/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I was written up for being late to work. I was late because somebody in my dorm stole my pants. All of them. FML

by pantless / 03/21/2016 at 2:57pm / United States (California) / Work