About Starzak : Contrary to popular belief, you're and your are NOT interchangeable for fuck's sake.
Starzak's FML badges
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Starzak's favorite FMLs
Today, I spiced things up by lying on the bed and pouring melted white chocolate on myself. I called out to my fiancé to come in. He was 'checking' his favourite scene in Batman vs Superman and couldn't hear me. I was stuck unable to move for ten minutes until he finally heard me. FML
by Chocolaty / 07/21/2016 at 8:48pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, I went to the store to get groceries. After getting all the stuff I need, and was heading towards the checkout point, I heard a baby cry and instantly felt coldness on my shirt. Yes I was lactating, and yes it was noticeable. FML
by gamerlaura / 07/21/2016 at 6:09pm / United Kingdom (Gwynedd) / Health
by ENDmySUFFERING / 07/21/2016 at 11:25am / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/19/2016 at 11:01pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML
by TheIrony / 07/19/2016 at 5:50pm / United States (California) / Transportation
by aurora320 / 07/19/2016 at 3:50pm / United Kingdom (Bournemouth) / Love
Today, I am on a 14 hour flight, stuck next to a large man whose rancid body odor is eclipsed only by his constant flatulence, which he loudly blames on me every time. On my other side is his friend who laughs like a moose at everything. There are no empty seats and no-one will trade with me. FML
by IamHM / 07/19/2016 at 2:36pm / United States (New Mexico) / Transportation
by ApplePie1994 / 07/18/2016 at 1:55pm / Ireland / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/18/2016 at 7:51am / Belgium / Work
by DidNotExpectThat / 07/18/2016 at 3:30am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Foolish / 07/18/2016 at 2:51am / United States (California) / Love
by Not true / 07/17/2016 at 10:56pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/17/2016 at 9:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was staying over at a friend's house for the weekend while the rest of my family goes to Cuba. Her neighbor started hitting on me. As it turns out, "he" was actually born as a "she", and now I'm apparently a transphobic bitch for not being interested. Two more days to go. FML
by Lady Bloodshart of the Redwater / 07/15/2016 at 4:27pm / United States (Texas) / Love
- Today, my best friend asked me to be his girlfriend. Out of pure shock i replied "is this a joke?"… Today, I was coaching some kids in table tennis when I told them to try a forehand loop, or smash.… Today, I found out that a very close friend of mine masturbates to photos of me on my Instagram and…