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Squirrel1256

Offline (the 04/15/2015 at 4:01am) | Search for a member

Squirrel1256

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 April 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1588
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Squirrel1256 : I love coming to FML to laugh, and feel better about myself.

Squirrel1256's page activity

Visits<b>osr215</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 3:35am<b>msturki</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 1:41pm<b>thisguy22</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 4:32am<b>TCRII</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 11:32pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 1:08pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 12:09am<b>Akerra89</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 9:48pm<b>larryb1986</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 12:37am<b>Indianboy9321</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 11:52pm<b>chris_42</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 11:47am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 5:58pm<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 9:50pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 9:45pm<b>abitabanana</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 8:47pm<b>hessel</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 2:41pm<b>mnie</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 8:04am<b>xbaumann</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 1:38am<b>kiba1229</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 11:27pm

Squirrel1256's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Squirrel1256's badges

Squirrel1256's favorite FMLs

Today, while driving home from work, I noticed the driver next to me was happily chatting on her phone. I fucking despise these would-be murderers, so I slammed my horn to signal my disgust. She panicked and swerved straight into my car. FML

#19761420
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18546) - you deserved it (60212)

On 06/09/2012 at 5:35pm - misc - by k - United Kingdom (Telford and Wrekin)

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

#19578544
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17513) - you deserved it (29988)

On 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm - animals - by doggone - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

#18593025
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14892) - you deserved it (37479)

On 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

#18593025
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14892) - you deserved it (37479)

On 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I introduced my parrot to oranges. Now she makes a high pitched scream if I don't give her any, and I've just run out of oranges. FML

#17489385
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27498) - you deserved it (10566)

On 08/16/2011 at 11:00am - misc - by bursteardrums (woman) - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, in an amphitheater, someone hit the back of my head. As I turned around, the guy apologized and said he mistook me for his friend. I changed seats, and after a while, I got hit a second time. He was wrong again. FML

#17159323
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29329) - you deserved it (3388)

On 07/18/2011 at 3:09am - misc - by fthislyfe (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, a friend of mine was talking about how he'd spent over 30 hours on Call of Duty. I piped up and said "Oh yeah! Well I've spent well over 300 hours on Morrowind! Beat that!" To which he replied, "I've had sex. Beat that!" I couldn't. FML

#4432884
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23602) - you deserved it (64408)

On 08/10/2009 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Morrowindwhore (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

#2855395
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84134) - you deserved it (3983)

On 06/13/2009 at 11:13am - misc - by Toothy_Peg (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

#319539
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18470) - you deserved it (193579)

On 03/14/2009 at 11:16am - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

#142104
999 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79614) - you deserved it (448987)

On 02/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by Noname - United States (Michigan)



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